An eventful morning

SouthernN'Proud

Southern Discomfort
So. I go out to get in my truck to head to work this morning. Get in, sit down, situate m'self, mash the clutch, hit the key...nada.

No problem, says I. I jes hop ou'tchere and tighten the ol' battery cable up a bit and be on m'way. No sweat. Says I.

Well. It's pretty corroded up. So I take out me handy dandy pocket knife and commence to scraping'. No problem, says I. Be back on the road in no time flat. Jes reconnect this little doodad hyar, make it good-n-tight, and voila.

Hit the key. Nada.

Hmm. Says I. This might take a bit more inspection, detection, selection and neglection that I thought.

So I set off in search of a 7/16" wrench with which to really put a tightening on that cable end. Retrieve the wrench, get back to the truck, and start tightening.

Won't tighten. Too much crap in the joint of the cable end. Won't loosen either so I could clean it out. Stuck right good it is.

Hmm.

No problem, says I. I bought me another cable end last summer when the one on the lawnmower went kaput. I'll just have to cut this old one off and reattach the new one. Voila. No problem, says I.

So I commence to go fetch my handy dandy hacksaw. No better tool for the task of cutting through thick battery cables, especially at the awkward angle this one is sitting in.

But y'see, my dad has been here. This is the man who owns, quite litterally, over a million dollars in tools and can't find a screwdriver to save his ass. He is amember of the Use It And Pitch It Club. The very concept of returning any tool to a spot within the same zip code as the spot he found it in is alien to this man, who is otherwise a rational, loving, and wonderful person. And apparently, he's had ahold of m'hacksaws. Plural. Ain't one nowhere.

Hmm. Says I.

So I commence to rummaging about me toolbox, and what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a pair of tin snips, layin' ri'tchere. Git er done!

A scant fifteen minutes later, I have managed to snip through the battery cable, strip the coating from the end without amputating one or more fingers, attach the cable end, tighten sufficiently to last until approximately late June 2013, reconnect the battery, and pick up everything that dropped and rolled to the direct center of the truck on the gravel driveway. With much trepidation, I approach the driver seat once again. Anticipation hangs thick in the morning air, like gas clouds at Lambeau Field. I mash the clutch pedal. I turn the key.

Purrs like a kitten.

Of course, I'm now late for work, but it coulda been worse. Had this thing went south, oh, say in the driveway of one of me convicted felon type persons in a driving rain about 35 miles from civilization, for instance.

**Note to self: Call dad. Ask him just where the merry hell he left m'hacksaws. Plural.
 

MrBishop

Well-Known Member
May you live in interesting times is a curse for good reasons. :)

At least you knew more about how to fix the problem than just picking up the phone and calling the local garage. Good luck finding those hacksaws! :)
 

SouthernN'Proud

Southern Discomfort
MrBishop said:
At least you knew more about how to fix the problem than just picking up the phone and calling the local garage. Good luck finding those hacksaws! :)


There is no such thing as the local garage. I'm past the sticks out here.

HomeLAN said:
Nope. Call Dad. Tell him he owes you a new set of hacksaws. Craftsman or better.

Oh, I'll find 'em eventually. He's put 'em somewhere thinking that's where I would find them. Why it fails to dawn on him that putting them back where HE found them would make more sense is, well, just one of the joys of knowing my dad.
 

greenfreak

New Member
MrBishop said:
At least you knew more about how to fix the problem than just picking up the phone and calling the local garage.
That's me. I don't touch anything under the hood with cutting tools. Lord no. :eek:
 

Professur

Well-Known Member
More to the point, he drives something that won't explode the moment you open the hood without having hooked up a computer to it. On my pickup, I'd chance a repair like that. On the minivan, you can't even see the battery, never mind the leads.
 

Luis G

<i><b>Problemator</b></i>
Staff member
Professur said:
More to the point, he drives something that won't explode the moment you open the hood without having hooked up a computer to it. On my pickup, I'd chance a repair like that. On the minivan, you can't even see the battery, never mind the leads.


Ohh yeah, I kinda hate that about newer cars. I have fixed small things on the datsun 74 I have, but with the renault.....geez I can't even find where to put the damn windshield wiper fluid!!!


*note to self: look at the manual again for that damn deposit.
 

TexasRaceLady

Active Member
I long for the simpler days when I could open the hood and know what the hell I was looking at.

Nowdays, about all I can find is the master cylinder and the radiator cap. Oh, and where you check the oil and tranny fluid.

The damned air filter isn't where it has always been, either!
 
Professur said:
More to the point, he drives something that won't explode the moment you open the hood without having hooked up a computer to it. On my pickup, I'd chance a repair like that. On the minivan, you can't even see the battery, never mind the leads.

that sucks :(
 

Liliandra

New Member
all of this, combined with the fear of being flattened by something even bigger than me, is why I still don't have a car, lol
 

Inkara1

Well-Known Member
For being a newfnagled car, it's surprisingly easy to get to everything in the Neon.

Nothing beats the '62 Fairlane for simplicity of repair though. Nothing like being able to remove the exhaust manifilds, put on new exhaust gaskets and re-attach the manifolds without having to loosen a single non-exhaust bolt.
 

Dave

Well-Known Member
i think i owned the honda for the better part of a year before i even opened the hood and looked in the engine bay. didnt know what the hell i was looking at, but i looked.
 

ekahs retsam

New Member
greenfreak said:
That's me. I don't touch anything under the hood with cutting tools. Lord no. :eek:

Same here, I don't even want to look under the hood. It isn't my job that is why I have a new car and number to call if something goes wrong.
 
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