Up for bid, is the really Gross Thing That Fell Out Of My Ceiling. Yes...yes...I know. You may not need any more gross things in your Gross Collection, but hear me out...you're gonna want this. I was doing some remodeling in my dining room last spring and there were some cheap, ghetto-like ceiling tiles that needed to be replaced, due to water damage. It was hotter than Hades in the house and I was ready to take a break, but I only had a couple more tiles to pull down. Don't know why it was so hot, but I was sweating like a trollop in church. Anyway, when I yanked out the last one, a shower of ceiling flotsom rained down on my head, and I felt something whap me on the noggin. Fearing it was a gigantic woman-eating spider or someone from the IRS, I beat myself in the head repeatedly until I thought I had killed it.
When I came to, lying on the floor beside me was this rotted, nasty, stained, twisted and completely disgusting female undergarment. I think it's a bra. Now, I've lived in this 100+ year old house for 15 years, and not once have I stored my dainties under the floorboards. Needless to say (but I'm saying it anyway) I was both repulsed and facinated by this filthy display of feminine frippery. No telling how long it had been up there....waiting. *shudder* Most people would have tossed it in the trash, but for some reason, I bagged it and kept it.
and it ain't long since I've eaten 
