Dumbest and best jokes you ever heard (Warning may not be suitable for children)

Hey I said I am not proud of it.....in fact I am downright sorry and that kid prolly makes more money in a year now than I will in 5....so the jokes on me.....Is that really you in the pic?
 
markjs said:
Hey I said I am not proud of it.....in fact I am downright sorry and that kid prolly makes more money in a year now than I will in 5....so the jokes on me.....Is that really you in the pic?

Of course. Why? ?(

A bit out of date now though (it's from school). I'll get a new picture posted soon.
 
twat.jpg


;)
 
unclehobart said:
A man's son three year old birthday was coming up and he deicided to buy his son a ping pong ball set. when he gave it to his son, his son loved it, but when his father came home one he looked and the set hadn't been touched but all the ping pong balls were gone, he had figured his son lost them and shrugged it off.

when his son was turning six years old he asked his son what he wanted and his son said "ping pong balls" and his dad was like "..wha ping pong balls? wouldn't you rather have a bike or something?" and his son said "no ping pong balls" so his father got him a bike and in the basket was filled with ping pong balls. when his father came home from work the bike wasn't touched but the ping pong balls were missing, he looked around abit but didn't find them so ignored it.

when his son turned 16 he asked his son, what do you want for your birthday and his son said "ping pong balls" and his father goes "..ping pong balls..ok..but why not a car?" and his son goes "..no ping pong balls" and his father says "..alright then". for his birthday his dad got him a car full of ping pong balls. when his dad came home the next day the car was opened but all the ping pong balls were missing, he just ignored it not knowing what to think.

his son was going to go to college and his dad asked him what he would like and his son said "ping pong balls" and his father goes "..again ping pong balls? wouldn't you rather have me pay for your dorm or something?" and his son says "no ping pong balls" and his father says well alright, he pays for a dorm filled with ping pong balls. the next time he came to see his son at college the ping pong balls were missing, he looked all threw the dorm but couldn't find them anywhere but let it go once again.

when his son was going to get married his father asked him what he wants as a wedding gift and his son said "ping pong balls" and he said "...ok..but how about I pay for a house for you and your wife?"
and he says "no I want ping pong balls" so his father pays for a house, full of ping pong balls. when his father came to help his son move everything in the house the next day, all the ping pong balls were missing, he had no clue were they could have gone.

alittle while later his son was said to have cancer and would die in a few days, his father visited his son in the hospital and said "son I'd like to know what I can get you as a last gift" and his son says "ping pong balls" and his father says "...alright" and he brings him a basket of ping pong balls. the next day his father came to see his son and the ping pong balls were all gone. He looked at his son and asked "son.. before you go can you please tell me what happened to all those ping pong balls I gave you?" and his son said "what I did with the ping pong balls? well i'll tell you I.." then he died.

OK, between this and using my name in the bear joke, you're beginning to piss me off...
 
They were both cut and paste from other places. Your anger lies with others as the use of your name is coincidental.
 
:eyemouth:


Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese.

There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Hsun-Chang.

But I think it's Colin. :)
 
What do an Elephants and a grapes have in common?

The both have trunks, except for the grapes..




Whats Red, and goes 'tick tick tick tick bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt'?

An apple! the ticking was to through you off


:D



and did anyone else laugh irl when they read the dumb jokes? :confuse3:
 
Nah - my grandad has a mega-wide nose. But then again, he was born in the jungle on an island in China so maybe he fell and squashed it whilst picking rice.
 
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