Everytime I get nervous/anxious I gotta spew. HELP!


New Member
Hello wise and worldy people. :)

I don't usually like making a fuss out of stuff like this (it seems so insignificant compared with some other people's "issues") but it's been going on for years and has gotten to the stage where it's just about fucking up my social life. :mad:

I find that everytime "the pressure is on" in a social context I rapidly get extremely nauseous. It's been progressively getting worse and worse for years - the first time I can remember was when I was about 13-14. I went for a meal with extended family and despite being absolutely starving I couldn't eat at all. Just bringing the food close to my mouth made me feel sick! In the end I had to force a couple of mouthfuls down and pretend I had a stomach bug.

That was the earliest I can remember it happening and I really can't remember what was on my mind at the time. Since then it's happened on the odd occasion when with family, but these days I'm generally ok in that kind of situation. Being out with friends is totally different... I've been out for meals with uni mates where I've eaten a miniscule amount and of course still had to pay my fair share of the bill. It sucks! Most of all, it's plain embarassing. Of course the other main downside is that I can't eat even if I've had nothing for hours and in the past have gone whole weekends, barely eating anything at all if I'm with friends. Makes hangover recovery very difficult (!!!), especially after having drunk on an empty stomach the night before. :rolleyes:

My dad remembers having something similar when he was younger, but it seems completely psychological and doesn't appear to have any connection to a physiological problem. I eat very well normally and really enjoy my food - a good balanced diet accompanied with a fair amount of exercise. I don't binge, I don't go for prolonged periods without eating, I definitely don't throw up after eating or have any weird self image-related issues. In fact at uni, I'd say that out of all my mates I probably eat the most and perhaps the most heathily. On the other hand, when I first started uni I couldn't eat at all in company for the first couple of days! Just the excitement I guess.

When the GF's mum cooks me a meal - argh... I just can't eat and have to apologise profusely and make up some BS. I mentioned on here a while ago that I have never actually been on a "proper" date. These days I can't imagine it at all - not being able to eat would be a huge problem for me. It's pathetic. I find it hard to talk to people about because I'm not really the nervous type and they just can't imagine me to have the problem. I joke about it usually ("Paul's Girlie Eating Disorder" one of my mates calls it) and sort of stick it out, but a few things have happened recently that have made me really want to do something about it:

~ A certain special person (who I have always liked - not reciprocated though) came round a few months ago and soon as I saw her I had to run upstairs and was actually physically sick! That was a real shock and I've only ever told a couple of people about. After that I was fine for a while but I was with her and a bunch of other friends for the next two days and could barely eat. We had roadtripped down south with me driving and I remember thinking on the way back (starving and feeling distinctly light-headed) that if I lost concentration, crashed and everybody got killed it would have been because of this stupid eating problem. Just about the only thing that gets me through on such occasions is the fact that when I'm drunk I can eat loads so normally have a big meal at 2-3am - further evidence that it's all in my head because when you're pissed you relax completely.

~ Just this weekend I was at a 21st b'day party and got a rather interesting offer - non-commital sex for the forseable future - from the hottest girl there! She's gorgeous, disgustingly clever and straight-up asked me whether I was interested, complete with lots of "ALL THIS COULD BE YOURS" prolonged gazing and cleavage/arse flashing (which my mates enjoyed apprently, lol). We kissed and OMG, I could have sworn I was going to chuck up right there. I declined her offer and I guess I probably a bit rude, but I was just so angry at feeling ill that it wasn't really a concern at the time. Man, that was SO shitty. She is such a great girl and I although I probably wouldn't have gone through with it anyway (call me crazy, but the last thing I need right now is another distraction), it just fucks me off that I felt so oppressed by nausea at the time. :(

Any ideas? My dad said it just went away in his early 20s (I'm 21, BTW) but I certainly don't want to wait! It obviously stems from being anxious - but going about "curing" anxiety seems like such an overwhelming task. Besides, people are inherently anxious and I don't think I'm any worse in that respect than the next dude.

Thanks for reading if you got down this far. :D



Too cute for words
This will sound weird, but have you considered a psychologist? I'm not making fun, I'm serious. I mean that's a lot more than annoying. At least talk to your doctor and see what they think. They make drugs that will keep you from getting nauseous, my wife is a chemotherapy nurse and they have to use them all the time. I'm afraid that I haven't really been much help. Good luck though.


molṑn labé
Staff member
I agree with chcr. As much as I think shrikns are quacks, it sounds like you may be developong an anxiety disorder type of stuff whatchmacallit thingy deal. Those can be real mofos mufu.


Well-Known Member
MuFu said:
it seems so insignificant compared with some other people's "issues"
I don't think that's insignificant at all. Your life could be much better without it, which is a good reason to think about this:
chcr said:
This will sound weird, but have you considered a psychologist?
I've been thru therapy for years and had my share of weird problems(still have some), believe me it can be caused by the most incredible reasons... They(therapists) have techniques and knowledge to find the right point of trauma. Also I've been reding some stuff lately that says all of our sickness are signs our mind give us of soemthing wrong on our life. Says that digestive problems are often caused by a fact that you can't "swallow". You have to evaluate your relations with these people that make you feel that way. What kind of problem/feeling your mind is trying to "mask" with this issue. Good luck and don't hesitate looking for professional help...


New Member
I'm with them... Remember you told me about your female friend a while back, is this her again? I wanted to know if all of this started with her because you had told me about it back then. But did it happen to you prior to that relationship?

By the way... anything happen with her?


Well-Known Member
talk to your doctor.
sounds like an anxiety disorder. there are quite a few meds for that. you should talk to a counselor too, see why it is that you get that anxious in social situations.

its quite possible you will outgrow it, but since you stated that it is fucking up your social life it will be better to get it taken care of now. you dont want it to get out of control.

good luck


New Member
Anxiety disorders are very common. I think you should get it looked at now rather than waiting till it gets worse.

I hope it gets better for you.


New Member

Thanks for the kind comments. Especially you, Buttcrack. :D

Yes, I have considered psychological treatment and may look to that in a couple of months or so when I get back to uni (and it is free!). I really rather not take any form of medication if possible - sure, they might be able to suppress the nausea but there will always be an underlying problem.

Had real problems at uni this year - during my first year (2001-2002) I was ill with a heart problem and had to repeat. Then this year I've just fucked around and still am not clean through into year two - I need to retake a couple of exams later in the Summer and have to get down to some serious work now. Perhaps once I get through that it'll be a huge weight off my shoulders and this stupid eating thing might disappear. I definitely worry about working etc constantly - never seem to get any done though. That's probably the single biggest contributing factor to this.

Amazing how easy it is to dig yourself into a hole when you're troubled by something that is both caused by and causes worry/anxiety... you just go round in circles getting worse and worse! Snapping out of it is so hard and while a lot of people have said "just don't think about it and it will go away", it's become part of me and I honestly have no idea how to stop it. I might not think about it for weeks and then it'll just spring up and make things very awkward. :mad:

greenfreak - same girl, yep. I've never had a relationship with her other than being just good mates. Although it happened before that for years, the incident when I was actually physically ill was the first where I can remember feeling really annoyed by it and realised it was getting the better of me. We're very good friends still, BTW. :)



New Member
Get your arse up to Manchester, have a decent night out with me, Nick (well... maybe not Nick ;) :D), and a few others. We'll let you drink your problems away :D

A psychologist maybe a good idea. I used to be like that when I was younger, but I just got over it myself somehow.

PS: Good job on the girl; nervousness is expected, chucking down her throat ain't so well done! ;) :D