I must be really lucky

[alex]

I've been on Bellsouth DSL for two days now and I've:

won about 24 million dollars

been offered free access to 8 porn sites (no, these are really free )

received offers on how to lose 40 lbs. in 30 minutes

received 10 offers to work from home and become a millionaire in two months

offer for top secret banned cd that is only being offered to me

3 time sensitive "were letting the secret outta the bag" offers

offer for cd with 250 billion email addresses on it

and last but not least........drum roll....

5 offers to have my penis enlarged

 

[Shadowfax]

Only FIVE offers to enlarge your penis?

Sue the bastards! :mad2:

 

[sbcanada]

Lose 40lbs in 30 minutes? How? By rolling a dumbell down the street and closing your eyes for 30 min, not seeing where it goes?

 

[Spirit]

received offers on how to lose 40 lbs. in 30 minutes

psssst.... gimme gimme gimme....

 

[equinoxe3d]

Oh, seems like you haven't claimed your free gifts?

And what about your debt problems?

 

[Shadowfax]

If you have any problems pad we can help you, ya know...

 

[alex]

well....the fun never stops, latest offer:


Guaranteed to increase, lift and firm your
breasts in 60 days or your money back!!

100% herbal and natural. Proven formula since
1996. Increase your bust by 1 to 3 sizes within 30-60
days and be all natural.

This email was from someone named Hye Bushy

 

[Shadowfax]

You must be a happy man, being able to increase your bust by 300 percent

 

[alex]

I was hopeing the day would come

 

[Leslie]

LOL@pad

 

[Shadowfax]

Getting really strange mental pictures here....

 

[alex]

*ponders the thought of having a large penis and large breastesess*

 

[Shadowfax]

Heh! I already HAVE those!


Why is everybody giving me those strange looks? [/siz]

 

[Justintime]

goodluck with your new physical features y'all

 

[Luis G]

aw......you didn't get university diplomas........

 

[alex]

WOOHOO, I just won another 11 million dollars....drinks are on me for the next twenty years

 

[Shadowfax]

I'll try to help you keep that promise

 

[AlladinSane]

offer for cd with 250 billion email addresses on it

That's exactly what I was looking for: The Milky Way, mailing catalogue

 

[Shadowfax]

That's exactly what I was looking for: The Milky Way, mailing catalogue

So you see, all my efforts for the SETI program aren't waisted

 

[alex]

Screw SETI, I've got all the little green bastards email addresses right here (insert alien headbang smilie here)

We'll just spam the hell outta them till they come down here to kick our ass