i want to ask my friend out.....

BlurOfSerenity

BlurOfSerenity

New Member
i have a really close, really good, really dear, really wonderful friend.
i've had a crush on him for a while. i think he likes me, too. it kind of shows, i think, when we sit close together with arms around each other, or when we hold hands, or when we hug for a long time, or when he lets me sit on his lap and put my arm around him....
he's been a lot to me. he's been there most of the times i've needed him, like in the middle of the night when im getting paranoid and sad. we chat online a lot.

"so, go out with him," you may be thinking now.
but im worried.
because while friendships may end in love, love rarely successfully ends in friendships.
if he and i become an item, then once we break up -- as is almost certain to happen, between two unstable teenagers such as ourselves -- ... it's all over. we wont be able to be friends anymore. i'll've lost someone so dear to me.

so that's my problem. do i ask him out, and risk throwing our relationship away,
or do i hold him, as friends, forever wishing we were something more?

lmao, whiny teenaged drama, i know, but....

what do you all think?
 
It is better to have lost in love that to never have loved at all.....
 
If it is that special, I would protect the friendship at all costs..but that doesn't stop you from talking to him about your feelings.
 
i talked to him...
i asked him if he knew how i feel about him. he said he didnt. i told him, that "i really really really really like" him... i told him that i thought that because he now knows how i feel, things could be awkward.
"because if it doesnt work out, i might lose you and i dont want to lose you, you're such a great friend to me," i told him.
"you will always be my friend, always," he assured me.
i asked him if he feels the way i feel about him, about me. he said he has felt that way, but was enjoying being friends now.
and everything is good, now. he knows how i feel, i know how he feels, and we're still just fine. i was afraid that just telling him my feelings would make things forever awkward... but it really didnt.
im so glad i talked to him!
 
ash r said:
"...you will always be my friend, always," he assured me. (...)
i was afraid that just telling him my feelings would make things forever awkward... but it really didnt.
im so glad i talked to him!
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It just shows how nice person he is, and how much great and strong your friendship is. I'm so happy for you :)
 
PuterTutor said:
It is better to have lost in love that to never have loved at all.....
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it's been my experience that its better to keep loving the person as a friend than to replace that love with hurt ... but that's me and I'm glad you found a way that fits you, ash :D
 
kuulani said:
it's been my experience that its better to keep loving the person as a friend than to replace that love with hurt
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I have to agree with kuulani..........

but so long as all is well. :)
 
id say go for it too ash. he maybe too shy and thinking about it too but too scared to ask. word to the wise. act now before its too late.and if it doesnt work out try to be friends and try not to break up over anything bad.
 
kuulani said:
it's been my experience that its better to keep loving the person as a friend than to replace that love with hurt ...
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I feel the same mostly because I've been through it.

Squiggy said:
If it is that special, I would protect the friendship at all costs..but that doesn't stop you from talking to him about your feelings.
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If I knew then what I know now, I would never have crossed the friendship boundary and just protected the great relationship that we once had. There's still a lot of hurt feelings (on my part, anyway) but I, personally, won't think about going out with a friend again. But ash, that's just me and my personal experience. I'm glad that he was MAN enough to be up front with you from the get go. :D

Good for you! Rock on! :headbang:
 
halamikage said:
Squiggy said:
If it is that special, I would protect the friendship at all costs..but that doesn't stop you from talking to him about your feelings.
Click to expand...

If I knew then what I know now, I would never have crossed the friendship boundary and just protected the great relationship that we once had. There's still a lot of hurt feelings (on my part, anyway) but I, personally, won't think about going out with a friend again. But ash, that's just me and my personal experience. I'm glad that he was MAN enough to be up front with you from the get go. :D
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I've been on the other side of the story. I regret not having asked some girl friends, with the purpose of 'not ruining friendship'. Most of them forgot me anyway. I would never let the opportunity of living a great thing go away again.
 
Me thinks he jus' wants a piece of Ash...................but that's jus' me.............

Perhaps Ash jus' doesn't care........or does she?

IMHO, I say, hold out for "true" friendship..........an' don't give up the "ship"......er somethin'..:)
 
ash r said:
i talked to him...
i asked him if he knew how i feel about him. he said he didnt. i told him, that "i really really really really like" him... i told him that i thought that because he now knows how i feel, things could be awkward.
"because if it doesnt work out, i might lose you and i dont want to lose you, you're such a great friend to me," i told him.
"you will always be my friend, always," he assured me.
i asked him if he feels the way i feel about him, about me. he said he has felt that way, but was enjoying being friends now.
and everything is good, now. he knows how i feel, i know how he feels, and we're still just fine. i was afraid that just telling him my feelings would make things forever awkward... but it really didnt.
im so glad i talked to him!
Click to expand...

Perhaps yer communicatin' yer feelins in much too scary a way.

To be honest, what ya said caused me to ffeel like ya don't have a clue in life, what ya want.

Which seems to imply ya want him to tell ya what to want in life.........not real comfortin' Darlin'.

Perhaps ya could reassess, what yer own goals r, with, or without the likes a his burdensome ass.

Perhaps make 'im feel like, yeah, yer interested, but whether he wants to come along or not, yer goin' somewhere that is more meaningful to ya, than whether he thinks its "somewhere" or not.

Does this make even a bit a sense? (I'm jus' a "guy", ya know?):)
 
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