more bash

[tonksy]

I'm sorry...I feel her pain. It's irritating and it's not even my head! Poor Mal.

 

[Inkara1]

You've never seen lice nits? Little white specks that don't come off the hair shaft unless you slide them off with your nails....which is what I just spent the last hour doing.

Kids now call that cooties? When I was a kid, we called that "lice."

 

[tonksy]

Cooties always = lice when I was a kid

 

[chcr]

Cooties always = lice when I was a kid

It was just a mean thing to say when I was (back in the dim reaches of antiquity, don'tcha know).

 

[tonksy]

Did they even have lice when you were a kid?

 

[chcr]

Did they even have lice when you were a kid?

Sure, they were just less evolved.

 

[tonksy]

Actually, they have found lice carcasses on the heads of Egyptian mummies.

 

[chcr]

It's okay, my mom wasn't Egyptian.

 

[Inkara1]

When I was a kid, cooties was some mythical disease that girls carried. No mention was ever made of what cooties actually does, but you didn't want to get it, so stay away from the girls.

Of course, the silly girls thought it was something they got from us.

 

[Nixy]

When I was a kid, cooties was some mythical disease that girls carried. No mention was ever made of what cooties actually does, but you didn't want to get it, so stay away from the girls.

Of course, the silly girls thought it was something they got from us.

I'm with Inky on this...cooties was what you got if you even touched someone of the opposite sex...even if you just held hands!

 

[tonksy]

Read the part on the etymology here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cooties. Seems we are both right....but having spent many of my formative years in the PI I tend to stick with the literal translation of "cooties".

 

[chcr]

Read the part on the etymology here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cooties. Seems we are both right....but having spent many of my formative years in the PI I tend to stick with the literal translation of "cooties".

My mom still wasn't Egyptian.

 

[tonksy]

Syrian? Greek?

 

[chcr]

Martian, maybe.

 

[tonksy]

Well, see, there you go. Only humans catch lice.

 

[spike]

<cassius_clay13> so I was with my friend bryan the other night in a bar
<cassius_clay13> well he got really drunk and said he was gonna puke
<cassius_clay13> so i helped him walk to the toilet
<cassius_clay13> all the stalls were occupied
<emoti_conartist> lol
<cassius_clay13> bryan is a rugby player... so a big guy
<cassius_clay13> so he fucking KICKS one of the stall doors open
<cassius_clay13> and there's this guy in there taking a shit
<emoti_conartist> hahahahahaha
<cassius_clay13> and bryan throws up ALL OVER HIM
<cassius_clay13> then (this is genius) bryan thinks 'oh shit... if i were taking a shit and someone came in and was sick all over me, i'd want to fuck him up... so i'd better hit him first'
<cassius_clay13> so he fucking SMACKS this guy in the face
<cassius_clay13> and runs away
<cassius_clay13> imagine being that guy... WORST NIGHT OUT EVER

 

[BeardofPants]

Buahahaha.

 

[GrandCaravanSE]

 

[Professur]

#772437 +(3129)-
GuyGuy: I am so fucking dead, dude.
Bilbo22: What's up?
GuyGuy: Ok, this is gonna take some explanation.
Bilbo22: Go for it.
GuyGuy: Alright. My wife goes crazy when I cum in her. She really likes the feeling of liquid shooting into her or something, cause she's absolutely nuts about it. It's like a fucking fetish.
GuyGuy: Anyway, Last week she went totally overboard with this. We were having sex, and everything was going great, but when I said I was about to cum she grabbed me by the shaft, forcefully yanked me out of her, got this fucking jar from the drawer in the nightstand, and collected my fucking semen in it.
Bilbo22: What the fuck?
GuyGuy: Yeah. Weird ass shit.
Bilbo22: No, I mean the fact you're telling me this shit. I don't want to hear this.
GuyGuy: It's important dude, hear me out.
Bilbo22: Fine, Fine.
GuyGuy: Anyway, I was asking what the fuck she was up to and she tells me she wants to save up my jism so she can take it all at once. So she sticks the jar in the fridge and tells me we can't have any more sex until I fill the thing entirely.
GuyGuy: And long story short, I just don't got that much juice in me, so after a week of trying to jack it until I could fill it, my penis felt like it was gonna burst. So I decided to cheat, and topped it off with some of this dove soap she has, cause it looks a lot like semen.
Bilbo22: Oh dear god, I know where this is going.
GuyGuy: So I give her the filled jar all indignant like cause she made me do this, and she promised me lots of kinky sex for it.
GuyGuy: Then she pulls a fucking turkey baster out of her dresser, sucks up the contents of the jar, sticks the baster in her pussy, and lets it rip.
GuyGuy: As it turns out, Soap apparently burns like a motherfucker when you put it in a woman's pussy.
Bilbo22: Oh shit man. When the fuck was this?
GuyGuy: Like, ten minutes ago.
Bilbo22: Then what the fuck are you doing on AIM!?
GuyGuy: Are you kidding? She's been in the bathroom for the past ten minutes screaming like a fucking banshee.
GuyGuy: I needed leverage. If she murders me now, I've got a witness who can testify against her.
GuyGuy: Oh shit, she's coming out now. If you don't hear from me in a few days, call the cops!
Bilbo22: I'll be sure to check under the porch for your body.

 

[Gato_Solo]

Martian, maybe.

You're mom is from Pennsylvania?