more bash

paul_valaru said:
please edit the link that got posted by mistake, I was tricked to going to tubgirl once, never again please
Ah, I was wondering what the heck that link was originally..
 
<helminthes> and the little basket at the counter says tips, so you hock a big loogie in it and then you realize what you did and say, "oh shit i'm dyslexic"

***

<Fembot> I choose you, PINGachu!
<Fembot> Variable sized packet attack!

***

<Afbc0m> my 3 yr old bro is here
<Afbc0m> he was listening to eminem and started swearing
<Afbc0m> my mom was pissed
<Afbc0m> in the middle of dinner, he was like, "bitch please, get down on yo knees"

***

<DannyB> some girl on the street asked if i was saved yet
<DannyB> i told her i saved at the checkpoint a couple minutes back
<DannyB> and can reload from there if i die
<DannyB> she was confused:hmm:
 
Hey Psyko, if the world was gonna end in 3 minutes, what would you do?
I'D SCREW ANYTHING THAT MOVES!!!
What would you do?
... ... ... I'd stand very very still. o.o;

haha, im taking this ethics certificatino thing online...they have the answers in the source code


i feel old when i'm reading the centerfold data in playboy and see that the centerfold was born sometime around the year i graduated high school
:\ heh old, or dirty ?
both but dirty i'm ok with




That last one really hits home.
 
<EqD> How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
<Castille> 1 to cry about it, 5 to post to an indie rock forum talking about how great the new lightbulb is, 15 to say that the old lightbulb was just fine, and to wish they'd stop changing their light and 25 to flame each other on typoes and musical taste?
<Castille> so ... 41?
<EqD> Frankly, I don't care. Let the little fuckers cry in the dark.

<
Tarl> You ever meet me, and I'm depressed, I will hit you soooo hard if you hug me.
<Beoulve> You're not secure enough in your sexuality for me to hug you.
<Tarl> No. I'm not secure enough in *your* sexuality for you to hug me.
 
<Raize> can you guys see what I type?
<vecna> no, raize
<Raize> How do I set it up so you can see it?



<+kritical> christin: you need to learn how to figure out stuff yourself..
<+Christin1> how do i do that



<green> We vegetarians love the environment. carnivores are sick freaks.
<Frank> How can vegetarians possibly love the environment.. you keep eating all the fucking plants


<Edofnor> #1 pickup line of all time: "Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?


<Casey8> Diana Ross' husband died
<Tarrier> how
<Casey8> fell while climbing in South Africa or something
<JennAway> that's sad
<Bubbaprog> i guess there is a mountain high enough



<BlackDeth> i like stalked this girl sorta :D
<BlackDeth> like once she asked me for a ride home from work
<BlackDeth> and i took her home... i dropped her off at her house
<BlackDeth> and shes like... wait a minute..how did you know where i lived?




<FireHmpstr> My friend broke up with his girlfriend or whatever
<FireHmpstr> So now every damn time I see the fucker I have to hear him whine
<FireHmpstr> "But I loved her so much, how could i ever live without her, Blah blah..."
<FireHmpstr> And all I can think about is how to kill him without anybody finding out.
<FireHmpstr> and then maybe rape that bitch too
<XKKBK> err, are you talking about me?
<FireHmpstr> OH SHI-
<FireHmpstr> forgot you were here



<rush> anyone ever notice that klingons speak unix?
<rush> "Grep ls awk chmod"
<rush> "Mknod ksh tar imap"
<rush> "Wall fsck yacc"
<assassin> dude. you even give geeks a bad name.



<n0vablaze> why do people automatically hate me when i join a channel?
<detmer> it saves time
 
<Kyle> The band Disturbed is holding open auditions for a new bass player. That's my ticket outta this hell hole! Hey, where can I rent a bass?
<icabod> I'll lend you one
<Kyle> Niiiice. Now, how do I play?
<icabod> It's just like guitar, except you get fewer chicks

:laugh:
 
Good stuff!

<tatclass> YOU ALL SUCK D**K
<tatclass> er.
<tatclass> hi.
<andy\code> A common typo.
<tatclass> the keys are like right next to each other.


<anamexis> oh man
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile ([email protected]) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick f**kers)
<anamexis> :<

<mage> what should I give sister for unzipping?
<Kevyn> Um. Ten bucks?
<mage> no I mean like, WinZip?


<jeebus> the "bishop" came to our church today
<jeebus> he was a fucken impostor
<jeebus> never once moved diagonally


<[TN]FBMachine> i got kicked out of barnes and noble once for moving all the bibles into the fiction section


<DmncAtrny> I will write on a huge cement block "BY ACCEPTING THIS BRICK THROUGH YOUR WINDOW, YOU ACCEPT IT AS IS AND AGREE TO MY DISCLAIMER OF ALL WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, AS WELL AS DISCLAIMERS OF ALL LIABILITY, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL OR INCIDENTAL, THAT MAY ARISE FROM THE INSTALLATION OF THIS BRICK INTO YOUR BUILDING."
<DmncAtrny> And then hurl it through the window of a Sony officer
<DmncAtrny> and run like hell


<NHBoy> I broke my G-string while fingering a minor :(
<rycool> ...
<NHBoy> I was trying to play Knocking on Heaven's Door.
<NHBoy> Oh well, time to buy new strings.

JstWnnaHveFuN08: do you think i should call a guy friend and talk to him about my problems? or will he not care?
Thilo: Here's how it works: if a guy helps you with your problems, you're obligated to give him a blowjob.
JstWnnaHveFuN08: lol thanks that cheered me up
Thilo: No problem. That'll be one blowjob please.

<Archeoptrix> Some girl I know is goign to open up an abortion clinic called "Humpty Dumpty" when she grows up

<karl> OK, fixed.
<dbaker> Fixed?
<karl> I don't mean fixed like it works.
 
(@`H4X0R`) Rape is such a negative term, I think we should call it "suprise sex"]

<superghos> sometimes my dick gets so hot it feels like it's going to burn a hole through my mouth

(@Big_Daddy) that reminds me, Beer i've lost 30 lbs :D
(@nwar) thats like throwing a deck chair off the titanic :p


<GLE> Does eating a chunk of cheese rolled in sandwich meat make me a fatass?
<JimiThing> im inclined to say yes
<JimiThing> but depends on the size and type of cheese
<JimiThing> and the kind of meat
<GLE> Sunrise thin-sliced turkey, and old cheddar cheese with a volume of about... 5 cm^3?
<Phil_> Nah... but I'm pretty sure figuring out the volume of a piece of cheese makes you a virgin.

<Lincoln`s_Wax> "The vacuum of space can suck like a mofo!" "Captain, get your penis out of the window!

<`Frieza> dont you get it! I have a giant Brain that is capable of reduceing anything down to a yes or no question.
<bUdDyLeE> LOL `Frieza I don't think that's how it's supposed to work
<bUdDyLeE> watch
<bUdDyLeE> What is the meaning of life?
<`Frieza> yes
<bUdDyLeE> elaborate
<`Frieza> no
<bUdDyLeE> fair enough.
 
<Argentius> I fell asleep again in class today...
<Darkersun> that sucks man, what did the teacher do?
<Argentius> I am the teacher >.<

***********************************

WindMage1: my cat already had kittens a month ago
WindMage1: we took her in to get fixed, and they're like "We can't... she's pregnant"
WindMage1: and I said "That bitch said she was on the pill!"
WindMage1: and then there was very awkward silence in the vet's office.
 
<@Chin^> My sister caught me jacking off the other week and calls me a pervert
<@Chin^> just the other day i walked into my room and caught my sister masturbating
<@Chin^> So she calls me a pervert again?!?
<@Chin^> there is no justice in the world...


************

(Mootar) morons.
(Mootar) these people who live in my apartment complex are connected to my wireless
(Mootar) they must think they're super-cool hackers by breaking into my completely unsecure network
(Mootar) unfortunatly, the connection works both ways
(Mootar) long story short, they now have loads of horse porn on their computer
 
#720258
Today, 01:35 PM
<grr rapture> this is so gross
<grr rapture> my friend was having sex with this girl and halfway through he realized she was on her peiod, but he finished up anyway
<yadrisil> just like bush in iraq
<grr rapture> ?
<yadrisil> he doesn't know when to pull out of a bloody mes

***
<@Headknocker> what happens when 5 emos sit in a square room?
<@Headknocker> one dies because he has no corner to cry in :D
 
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