Can't you turn the bottle upside-down and put it in a water cooler or something? Do that when you're still sober, and then when you're plastered you can still serve it without spilling two gallons of stuff with dark kool-aid in it all over the light-colored apartment carpet? Kool-aid dye, for some reason, is more effective than hair dye or clothes dye. The carpet will have to be replaced to get the spot out.
