they should give a medal for parenting of this quality

Totally fair? No. More fair than a special interest group? Yes.

I assume you are meaning the fact that the literature is pointed towards women that have been abused? This is a problem, and one that some steps are being taken to rectify, but sometimes not nearly enough.

It's just too hard to believe, in alot of cases, a man calling up the police because his wife is abusing him. Unfortunatly, in alot of areas, the cops would get a big laugh out of it, and not take it seriously.
 
Most, if not all, of those pdf files dealing with domestic abuse have the male being the perpetrator and the female the victim. The reason for this is because of the juggernaut of women'r rights at the expense of men, and the last sentence of your most recent response.

The point I made in my rebuttal post was that, even though the Justice department only reports facts, those facts can also be skewed. In this case, towards the women's side of the issue. And rather heavily skewed at that. Let's face it. Men in general, and white men in particular, are singled out as violent, chauvenistic cretins whose only aim in life is to spread our genes to anyone and anything willing to accept them. Women keep this idea in the heads of men, and children, through a slow and steady bombardment throughout our lives under the guise of 'education'.

How many times have you seen a woman hit a man and then say 'men don't hit girls'?
How many times have you seen anyone come to the aid of the man?

If you have not ever seen this, please hold your comments to yourself, as me and the cabana-boy are having an in-depth discussion... ;)
 
Oh Hell. This isn't going to be much fun if I agree with you, but...

I've seen it, lived it in fact. My ex would love to hit me, and one day, I was in a bad mood, and struck back. I shoved her down onto the bed, not much harder that I had shoved her on the bed for other purposes, she reminded me of that til the day we divorced. It's a double edged sword, if she does it, it's playfulness, if he does it, it's abuse.
 
It's not about fun...it's about what's going on. Men are almost always blamed for DV, even if the woman initiates it, as was your case. There should be no reason that police coming to 'your' house to answer a DV complaint automatically assume that the male is the abuser. Just as there should be no reason to agree that the Justice department is more, or less, correct than the Father's Rights site. Those pamphlets I linked were written by the Justice Department, with funding from both the department and a series of Women's Rights groups. Somewhere in the middle, the truth lies.

We must change the system for the good of all of us...not just a few.

1. Domestic Violence is to be treated as assault and battery...regardless of the gender/religion/race of the offender.
2. Punishment for a crime must be equal all the time...robbing the corner store get's you less money than embezzelment, but you spend more time in jail for the robbery...Stealing is stealing. No more white-collar crimes.
3. Lawyers are not allowed to run for public office. I may get flack for that one, but the gorilla is on the table now.
4. Judges should be appointed.
5. Once a crime receives a certain punishment, all subsequent cases shall have the same punishment. That one is ugly, too.
6. Personal responsibility is more important than personal liability.
I can't really think of many more, but I believe we can discuss those along with our on-going discussion on the sad state of some folks parenting.
 
a lot of women have hit me, as part of a joke or pissed, it really doesn't hurt, but "it is allowed", and nobody says a thing about it. I can imagine your case PT.
 
I think one of the worst is #6. I see this all the time, especially with children. If they get a homework assignment that is hard, they are screaming that the teacher is being unfair. If they don't do that homework assignment, Then it's all a plot and the teacher overloaded them with work. If they did it and got half of it wrong, it was becuase the teacher didn't explain what to do well enough. In none of these cases do the children say "It's my fault, I didn't do it." or "It's my fault, I wasn't paying attention when she was telling us what to do"

The really sad thing is these same kids can tell their parents that, and the parents will go to bat for them with the school. I saw this on another forum a while back, doubt that it's real, but it wouldn't bother me a bit if it was.




Answering machine message for the Pacific Palisades High School

(California)

(The school and teachers were being sued by parents who wanted their children's failing grades changed to passing grades even though those children were absent 15-30 times during the semester and did not complete enough school work to pass their classes.) This was voted unanimously by the office staff as the actual answering machine message for the school:




--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in connecting the right staff member, please listen to all your options before making a selection:

To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1

To make excuses for why your child did not do his work - Press 2

To complain about what we do - Press 3

To swear at staff members - Press 4

To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you - Press 5

If you want us to raise your child - Press 6

If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone - Press 7

To request another teacher for the third time this year - Press 8

To complain about bus transportation - Press 9

To complain about school lunches - Press 0

If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable, responsible for his/her own behavior, class work, homework, and that it's not the teachers' fault for your child(ren)'s lack of effort, hang up and have nice day!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Here is some more information on child abuse and maltreatment...Pages 33 and 34 have nice charts...Once again, take with a grain of salt...
Addendum...

This site is from the Center for Disease Control. Presumable, this is a more complete sampling.
 
my god the stepfather is a sick fuck. and how dare they call her mother when she was apathetic and didnt care for what her son was going through. i use apathetic in the sense she showed no emotion to the child and tv was more important to her. both should have been arrested. i cant believe people like this are walking around. :mad2: :puke: damn i cant read this story without feeling sick.
 
that is probably the stoopidest info I've ever read. Of course the stats read that way - how many single fathers do you know? :rolleyes:

I am a firm believer in not whining about the hand you're dealt. Yeah, it's hard to raise kinds as a single parent - but it's doable. And they can be well-adjusted, respectful, loving kids. Or is my family just a phreak of nature?
 
nalani said:
Or is my family just a phreak of nature?
Click to expand...

Hmmm. Phreaky? Yup. (But in a good way ;) )

But I think it has to do with the quality of the parents as to how the kids will turn out.
 
PuterTutor said:
If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable, responsible for his/her own behavior, class work, homework, and that it's not the teachers' fault for your child(ren)'s lack of effort, hang up and have nice day
Click to expand...

Damn kids these days don't have to be accountable ... that's the fault of the system. The kid didn't do his homework, it's the teacher's fault ... the kid beat up another kid, it's the teacher's fault ... the kid got an "F" for being a lazyass, it's the teacher's fault. :rolleyes:

I remember respecting all my teachers as a kid. These days, even the elementary schools kids show no respect, acting like brats and actually saying to me, "miss, i don't need to listen to you, you can't hit me."
What I wouldn't give to bitchslap that attitude out of the punk.
 
The actual thing is...you can't get caught hitting them. And if they squeal to their parents about it, and you don't leave any marks, you can always cite the kid's class-room record to the parents...

Back to the main topic...

Na said a few things that still haven't been clarified. Perhaps I wasn't clear in my intent of the whole statistics arena...

Of course, she also said I was whining. I found that, in particular, to be disturbing. Why is it that when I mention men's rights, custody rights, and who should, statistically, get the children, it's slapped down as whining?
 
nalani said:
that is probably the stoopidest info I've ever read. Of course the stats read that way - how many single fathers do you know? :rolleyes:

I am a firm believer in not whining about the hand you're dealt. Yeah, it's hard to raise kinds as a single parent - but it's doable. And they can be well-adjusted, respectful, loving kids. Or is my family just a phreak of nature?
Click to expand...


well see theyre phreaks of nature. instead of being bad people they have a great mother who raised them to be great kids. its doable if the parent is mature enough to raise the kids. there arent too many single fathers i know most single parents are mothers from my experience. but there are a few. if only people would stop being assholes and start fucking raising kids to be good kids and start caring about their kids this world might get somewhere. maybe im just a stupid idealist
 
No...actually they are not phreaks of nature. I just take issue with this statement...
I am a firm believer in not whining about the hand you're dealt.
Click to expand...
It seems that I struck a nerve when that wasn't intended, but, there you are.
 
I question the stat that 15% of single parent households are headed by men. It's a damned rare custody fight that ends up with the father winning. Sure, there are widowers, but I'm not betting it's that many. That would ttally invalidate the "under 1%" stat quoted above.

I wonder if this isn't just a little mysogeny showing its face...
 
I have heard of such cases. Two of my friends is a single dads...and in SC that is rare indeed. However...if those stats are correct, then my statements are a bit more true. You must remember, though, that even if everything is correct, the actual percentage of abused children is relatively small, and those stats deal not only with the facts as they are known, but also the propensity to commit said abuses.
 
interesting stats, may take a bit for me to take it all in but im a father who has his child for 3 1/2 days a week it isn't as much time as i'd like but it sure beats none at all...funny part of it is that 3 1/2 days consists of half the week, however i pay for his medical expenses and i pay child support plus i pay for his day to day living cost such as clothing food for the half a week he's with me, now maybe it's just me but why is it the man is always made to be the bad guy when here i sit doin what i consider to be more then my fair share........if i have my child 50% of the time why is it im paying child support for the time he's not with me and she's not ? why am i paying all medical costs ? the system is set up to the womens advantage when it comes to single parenting doesn't seem fair but there it is
 
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