Thinkers Anonymous

tank girl

tank girl

New Member
It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then -- to loosen up. Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker. I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true.
Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time. That was when I asked my boyfriend about the meaning of life. He spent that night at his mother's.

I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself. I began to avoid friends at lunch time so I could read Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it \hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."
This gave me a lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking ..." "I know you've been thinking," he said, "I want out!!"
"But surely it's not that serious."
"It is serious," he said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as outspoken intellectuals, and intellectuals don't make any money, just a lot of censorship and controversy so if you keep on thinking, we might even be branded guilty of terrorist activity!"

"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently. He exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
"I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door. I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with ‘Depeche’ Mode on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors... They didn't open. The library was closed. To this day, I sincerely believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.

As I sank to the ground, clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker's Anonymous poster. Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker. I never miss a TA meeting.

At each meeting we watch a recorded broadcast off Fox Network; last week it was "O’Reilly." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I still have my job, and things are much easier leaving the thinking to those guys in control.

Life just seemed ... easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me. Today, I tried to register to vote Republican...but then remembered I wasn't eligible to ,due to one appalling abberation; failing to have the god-given honour to be known as an American Citizen
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Yours -with love,
Tank Girl. :crying4:
 
tank girl said:
Today, I tried to register to vote Republican...
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I thought you said you stopped thinking. :devious:
tank girl said:
...but then remembered I wasn't eligible to ,due to one appalling abberation; failing to have the god-given honour to be known as an American Citizen
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Fortunately for the rest of us thinking Americans, this is still a requirement of the law. ;)
 
I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"
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How well I identify with that sentiment. I've even asked the question. It's in committee as we speak. I expect a full memo replete with policy citings and mission statements by June.
 
Yes its true, we Conservative Bosses really, really dislike it when our liberal employees try to think.

It then lead to unions, "fairness", and not being able to hire and fire as we see fit to run our business.

If you don't like the way I do my thinking, quit ....since I can't fire you without getting sued.

If you want to do the thinking, go create your own business. (... or in liberal terms, go and think about creating your own business)
 
when I get better I'll try and get his goat again. That might get the monkey off his back.
 
A.B.Normal said:
An American who uses a "u" for honour. :alienhuh:
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:clap:
athough it may be hard for you to admire the esscence of my true sarcastic nature, and an altogether dry sense of humour - let me point out to you that this neat observation amuses me even more, see I just love the irony of it...

as far as I'm concerned that is how the word is spelled in english. imo Americanisation sabotaged and corrupted many forms of the english language by coming up with stupid ideas like removing the "u" in humour.
 
tank girl said:
:clap:
athough it may be hard for you to admire the esscence of my true sarcastic nature, and an altogether dry sense of humour - let me point out to you that this neat observation amuses me even more, see I just love the irony of it...

as far as I'm concerned that is how the word is spelled in english. imo Americanisation sabotaged and corrupted many forms of the english language by coming up with stupid ideas like removing the "u" in humour.
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Maybe. But we remember the rules of capitalization at least...Now go point your snotty grammar argument somewhere else before you hurt yourself.
 
tank girl said:
:clap:
athough it may be hard for you to admire the esscence of my true sarcastic nature, and an altogether dry sense of humour - let me point out to you that this neat observation amuses me even more, see I just love the irony of it...

as far as I'm concerned that is how the word is spelled in english. imo Americanisation sabotaged and corrupted many forms of the english language by coming up with stupid ideas like removing the "u" in humour.
Click to expand...
The same can be said for slipping away from old english .. or roman latin. Stuff evolves all the time.

Hell... the elitist left in the UN wanted to abolish all languages in favor of the universal language of Esperanto a while back. You should be happy for our progressive refining of the language.
 
I think you should continue using the unnecessary "u" in such words as it screams "pretentious", particularly coming from a so-called American like yourself. Others will want to know that about you as soon as possible. It might also make sense to give up your American citizenship (assuming you still have it), so you can fully enjoy all the complications NOT being an American will afford you, besides using extra letters to spell perfectly simple words. ;)
 
Umm, may I point out that neither tg nor the author claims to be a US citizen? Tg is a New Zealander, and the author is actually saying that he is NOT a US citizen in the passage AB quoted.

Pretentious, yes, US citizen, no.
 
I don't think I am the only one who was given the impression that TG was an American living in New Zealand. If she's not an American, than most of these arguments are moot.
 
Hmm, then I don't see what everyone's all riled up about. If she's not an American, she's not expected to support American ideologies, politics or spelling. Her comments would not have seemed so offensive to me had I known that. I would just have attibuted them to her being another bitter America-hater, and left it at that.

Sorry if you're not an American, TG! :D
 
Well... commenting and slamming everything the world over is as old as the sun. We do it, they do it, they do it to us, we invade them and then shower them with platinum. Thats the way the world works.
 
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