This sex... issue...
- Thread starter Kittie
- Start date
AlphaTroll
New Member
Oh baby....oh baby.....oh.........
Never have I faked an orgasm.....can you tell?
(Hey Oz - leave some space next to the fire for me eh)
Never have I faked an orgasm.....can you tell?
(Hey Oz - leave some space next to the fire for me eh
)
Gato_Solo said:For a man to fake an orgasm, it would take 3 handlers and a special effects genius...
Nonsense
All yer need is basic acting skills and enough muscle control to twitch various bits convincingly (oh, and it has to be after two or three real orgasms......to ensure things are properly lubricated)
I mean we've all done it........been with someone yer don't really fancy and decided to cut the proceedings short......ain't we?
Or one that trusts ya
I've been promised the warmest sofa in the place......I'll save ya a seat
Gato_Solo
Out-freaking-standing OTC member
Oz said:Nonsense
All yer need is basic acting skills and enough muscle control to twitch various bits convincingly (oh, and it has to be after two or three real orgasms......to ensure things are properly lubricated)
I mean we've all done it........been with someone yer don't really fancy and decided to cut the proceedings short......ain't we?
If I already shot the wad 2 or 3 times, and she still wants more, then I haven't done my job properly, now have I?
As for the second statement...If I don't fancy her, I wouldn't be with her...I'm kind of old-fashioned that way.
Fruity_Angel
New Member
If it pleases your Mistress, do it.
Gato_Solo said:
All depends who ya with
(I've been with lasses that take minutes....and others that take hours )As for the second statement...If I don't fancy her, I wouldn't be with her...I'm kind of old-fashioned that way.
Ahh, I can tell yer've never been wasted on Cap'n Morgans.....amphetamines and a few dozen Jack Daniels
...... it's amazing how much yer morals slip when yer so wasted yer can't remember yer own name 
Gato_Solo
Out-freaking-standing OTC member
Oz said:All depends who ya with
You've gotta lick it first, Oz. You just can't go stabbing it right in.
Oz said:Ahh, I can tell yer've never been wasted on Cap'n Morgans.....amphetamines and a few dozen Jack Daniels
Nope. I usually got wasted on Malibu and Coca-cola...or Bacardi 151 and cider...or Seagrams Gin and Cranberry juice...or Goslings, ginger beer and lime juice...or just plain-old Henry Weinhardts Premium Lager. Never got so wasted I couldn't remember my name, though. And every woman I've been with, I've fancied at the time...
Gato_Solo said:You've gotta lick it first, Oz. You just can't go stabbing it right in.
Never?! Yer having a joke? Nobody told me that!
is that why it's always so dry that it feels like me foreskin is being ripped at the seam? 
Still sometimes takes hours tho'.........even I ain't egotistical enough to claim that every shag has been earth shattering for both of us everytime
*sigh* I wish I'd had that much self restraint in me younger days........maybe the nightmares wouldn't be been so horrific
Gato_Solo
Out-freaking-standing OTC member
Oz said:Still sometimes takes hours tho'.........even I ain't egotistical enough to claim that every shag has been earth shattering for both of us everytime
*sigh* I wish I'd had that much self restraint in me younger days........maybe the nightmares wouldn't be been so horrific
*Truly tasteless and sexist joke*
Q: How can you tell if your woman has an orgasm?
A: Who cares?
*
*Just kidding ladies. If I can't get the woman I'm with to reach the pinnacle with my tongue, I'll at least get her close enough so that my initial thrust will put her over the top...
Sometimes, though, I wish it did take hours, but I'm older now, so I only take, at most, one hour. Then I have to take about 15 minutes to recharge...
Gato_Solo said:
I dunno why but that just reminded me of an incident from many years ago ............
I was with a girl who faked an orgasm, she forgot to.......how can I put this delicately?.......she forgot to twitch various internal muscles, the ones that spontaneously twitch during an orgasm..........we got to the smoking-cigaretts-drinking-chatting-in-bed-stage afterward and I couldn't help but point out to her the flaw in her acting ability
I tell ya, I have never seen anyone get so embarrased and then get mad so quick in me life
.............. She wouldn't talk to me for months after that....and we certainly never hopped back into bed together
Gato_Solo
Out-freaking-standing OTC member
She was probably going to use that as ammunition at a later date...Oz said:I dunno why but that just reminded me of an incident from many years ago ............
I was with a girl who faked an orgasm, she forgot to.......how can I put this delicately?.......she forgot to twitch various internal muscles, the ones that spontaneously twitch during an orgasm..........we got to the smoking-cigaretts-drinking-chatting-in-bed-stage afterward and I couldn't help but point out to her the flaw in her acting ability
I tell ya, I have never seen anyone get so embarrased and then get mad so quick in me life
Tell all her friends about you, and that kind of thing. Of course...you could do the same with her, eh? Gato_Solo said:She was probably going to use that as ammunition at a later date...
Yeah, I suppose it could have all turned a bit gossipy and ugly
....... luckily it was only a quick shag.....nothing serious.......gods help me if she had strong feelings for me....that's when women get very touchy when yer point out that kinda thing
Gato_Solo
Out-freaking-standing OTC member
Oz said:Yeah, I suppose it could have all turned a bit gossipy and ugly
Even when they don't have strong feelings, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...
Fruity_Angel
New Member
And if the woman likes giving pain..................you had better learn to enjoy it or it will distroy you.
never understood the faking of orgasms....cuz if they think they've done it right the first time that's all you'll ever get.