To befriend or not to befriend? That is the question.

[IDLEchild]

Say your kid makes good friends with the new neighbors kid. They both hang out and finally little "Timmy" has a same age buddy to frolic out with. Now you are glad that your "timmy" has a play pal but now the kid's parents want to get to know you....you aren't looking for new friends and the kid's parents aren't enticing people to begin with...

....so do you forge a friendship out of the goodness for your kid or do you keep your distance and make it quite evident to the neighbors that you have no intention of forming any friendly relations and only want your kid to befriend their kid?

Obviously the neighbor will take that as an insult and put up some sort of restrictions on their kid barring him to play with your kid.....so for the sake of your child's happiness do you force yourself to hang out with boring people?

 

[Gonz]

You can become friendly without becoming friends can't you? I wouldn't have any of my kids folks to something important but I can waste time on small talk with them.

 

[tonksy]

this is a way common parenting dilemna...you are just very nice and pleasant and that's it. generally, if the parents have little in common besides the children this will be enough. if they want to forge a friendship and you do not, i say...why the hell not? as the old adage says "try it, you may like it"...afterall, you can never have too many friends.

 

[kuulani]

As a kid, I played with all of the kids on my street, and it didn't matter to me one bit that my parents and their parents did nothing more than wave at each other when driving pass.

 

[Professur]

Who's more important, you or your kid? If you even have to think about that for a second, you're not a parent, you're a donor.

 

[PT]

I try to at least get to know the parents of my kids friends. I kinda like to know who they are before I let my kids go hang out in their house. It amazes me the kids that are allowed to spend the night at our house without us ever meeting their parents.

 

[MrBishop]

Personally...I like to know which kid belongs to which parent(s)...especially in my area. If something goes wrong (kid gets hurt)..it's nice to know where to go to inform whom. It's also good if someone's looking for their kid and ask me "Have you seen little Timmy?" and I know that a) this is Timmy's parent and not some molester b) Timmy is missing.

I also know that once my kid is old enough to wander by himself, that people will be looking out for him somewhat. We've also shared phone numbers with our neighbours.

Now..that being said...I knwo these people by sight, I know which kids are theirs, I'll wave to them if they pass, and may even chat them up (weather, sports etc...)...but they aren't my friends. They won't be coming over for supper, or a night at the movies etc.

Our kids can still play together. That's enough by me.