Tonks

paul_valaru

paul_valaru

100% Pure Canadian Beef
Hi everyone, Tonks's harddrive has gone to meet it's maker, and until she can get it replaced, she will be living only in the real world.

She just asked me to pass on the news
 
it was truly evil, if you played tio backwards


it made a hidious screeching noise

I mean it sounded worse than NKOTB!
 
paul_valaru said:
I do not churn butter with mechanical things


not since that belt sander incedent
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ROFLMAO! :rofl4:

Poor tonksy! I hope she is able to handle the real world - it is so cruel sometimes.... ;)
 
Bummer. Hope her lil' ones don't drive her too crazy without OTC to balance it out.

Oh, wait. I imagine she's already crazy. :lol:

*waves to Tonks if she can read this* Hope you get the puter working soon! :D
 
Poor tonksy :(

Stupid technologly

*gives his computer a sympathetic kick in the floppy*
 
If is sisn't have internet access I don't know what I would do

Oh wait, i would actually work


god, that would go against everything I stand for
 
Without the internet?

Damn, I'd have to go back to full-time masturbation........it's either that or soap operas.
 
paul_valaru said:
another point, I would have to withstand the scathing looks of martonly ladies as i purchase my porn
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I love buying my porn from the nice people at the Hustler shop - get great discounts if you flirt with the assistants ;)
 
i avoid sex shops, if I'm alone, It makes me feel like I'm aperv, of course my first experience was not to good, I wanted to by a female freind a gag gift, flavoured condoms, and I was to chicken to go in myself, so I dragged my friend mike in with me, my other friend was laughing as we came out, we asked why, and he pointed out to men just walked in to buy flavoured condoms, imagine what the clerk (a hot chick) thought.

when we turned red, and admitted to actually argueing about what flavour to buy...well, he jsut fell down laughing
 
I took two of my mates with me to an adult shop a while ago. They're both married, but neither of them have ever used a flavoured lube or some toys or anything - so I took it upon myself to remedy the situation.

Unfortunately the one was highly pregnant (just about ready to pop), so the poor assistant kept telling her "Are you sure about this one" or "That one is REALLY strong" whenever she looked at a vibrator :rolleyes: And I got all kinds of funny looks from the other chick behind the counter - eventualy felt like telling her "Hey - it's not mine"

Oh & I ended up having to pay for everything, because my friends were too embarrassed to go to the counter & pay for their lubes - chicks eh :rolleyes:
 
My first trip to a pr0n store was with three girls and two other guys. Wanted to rent porn, but ended up finding out OK state law won't allow certain....um..."scenes." We ended up renting two of the CHEESIEST movies....oh my god, I've seen porn, and I've seen bad porn, but this was just insane. Think Monty Python quality movie making...I couldn't believe it. I know porn usually doesn't have much of a plot, but I'm convinced these movies had negative plot.

I don't even remember the names. One was a volume eight. Note to self....don't rent porn in oklahoma.
 
Monty pythonesque porn?

*man looks at own crotch, and says "not quite dead yet"*

the man is not impotent, his cock is just "pining for the fjords"?
 
bleach said:
Wot's a NKOTB? :confused:
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New Kids On The Block - as any self respecting teenage chick of the late 80's / early 90's would know ;)

(and they my dear were the bastards who spawned all those godawful boy bands we see today)
 
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