sbcanada
New Member
Uncle SB's house of sorta funny shit
The Pope has just finished a tour of the Napa Valley and
is taking a limousine to San Francisco. Having never
driven a limo, he asks the chauffeur if he can drive for a
while. The chauffeur feels like he doesn't have much of a
choice, so he climbs in the back of the limo and the Pope
takes the wheel.
The Pope proceeds down Silverado, and starts accelerating
to see what the limo can do. He gets to about 90 MPH, and
suddenly he sees the red & blue lights of the highway
patrol in his mirror. He pulls over and the trooper comes
to his window.
The trooper, seeing who it is, says, "Just a moment
please, I need to call in." The trooper calls in and asks
for the chief. He tells the chief that he's got a REALLY
important person pulled over, and asks how he should
handle it.
"It's not Ted Kennedy again is it?" asks the chief.
"No Sir!" replies the trooper, "This guy's more
important."
"Is it the Governor?" asks the chief.
"No! Even more important!" replies the trooper.
"Is it the PRESIDENT??? asks the chief.
"No! Even more important!" replies the trooper.
"Well WHO THE HECK is it?" screams the chief.
"I don't know Sir." replies the trooper, "but he's got the
Pope as his chauffeur!"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
The other day I was in the local auto part store. A lady comes in and asks for a seven ten cap. We all look at each other and ask, "What's a seven ten cap?"
She says, "You know, it's right on the engine. Mine got lost somehow and I need a new one."
"What kind of a car is it?" they ask. Now I'm thinking maybe an old Datsun Seven Ten, but no, she says that it's a Buick.
"Okay, Lady, how big is it?"
She makes a circle with her hands about 3 l/2 inches in diameter.
"What does it do?" we ask.
She says, "I don't know, but it's always been there."
One of us gives her a note pad and asks her if she can draw a picture of it. So she makes a
circle about 3 l/2 inches in diameter and in the center she writes 7l0. The guys on the other side of the counter are watching as she draws ... and then when they saw it they started laughing.
One guy says, "I think you want an oil cap."
She says, "Seven Ten cap, oil cap, I don't care what you call it. I just need one, and I don't see what is so funny about it."
Yes, she was a blonde.
Now get a paper, draw a circle, write 7l0 inside of it. Now rotate the circle l80 degrees.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Feel free to add your own sorta funny shit!
The Pope has just finished a tour of the Napa Valley and
is taking a limousine to San Francisco. Having never
driven a limo, he asks the chauffeur if he can drive for a
while. The chauffeur feels like he doesn't have much of a
choice, so he climbs in the back of the limo and the Pope
takes the wheel.
The Pope proceeds down Silverado, and starts accelerating
to see what the limo can do. He gets to about 90 MPH, and
suddenly he sees the red & blue lights of the highway
patrol in his mirror. He pulls over and the trooper comes
to his window.
The trooper, seeing who it is, says, "Just a moment
please, I need to call in." The trooper calls in and asks
for the chief. He tells the chief that he's got a REALLY
important person pulled over, and asks how he should
handle it.
"It's not Ted Kennedy again is it?" asks the chief.
"No Sir!" replies the trooper, "This guy's more
important."
"Is it the Governor?" asks the chief.
"No! Even more important!" replies the trooper.
"Is it the PRESIDENT??? asks the chief.
"No! Even more important!" replies the trooper.
"Well WHO THE HECK is it?" screams the chief.
"I don't know Sir." replies the trooper, "but he's got the
Pope as his chauffeur!"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
The other day I was in the local auto part store. A lady comes in and asks for a seven ten cap. We all look at each other and ask, "What's a seven ten cap?"
She says, "You know, it's right on the engine. Mine got lost somehow and I need a new one."
"What kind of a car is it?" they ask. Now I'm thinking maybe an old Datsun Seven Ten, but no, she says that it's a Buick.
"Okay, Lady, how big is it?"
She makes a circle with her hands about 3 l/2 inches in diameter.
"What does it do?" we ask.
She says, "I don't know, but it's always been there."
One of us gives her a note pad and asks her if she can draw a picture of it. So she makes a
circle about 3 l/2 inches in diameter and in the center she writes 7l0. The guys on the other side of the counter are watching as she draws ... and then when they saw it they started laughing.
One guy says, "I think you want an oil cap."
She says, "Seven Ten cap, oil cap, I don't care what you call it. I just need one, and I don't see what is so funny about it."
Yes, she was a blonde.
Now get a paper, draw a circle, write 7l0 inside of it. Now rotate the circle l80 degrees.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Feel free to add your own sorta funny shit!
