paul_valaru
100% Pure Canadian Beef
unclehobart said:
I've been wawiting since this thread started to hear the story, and all i get is nickname by co-workers!!!!!
the humanity
Where did your nickname come from?
- Thread starter Bungi
- Start date
I've been wawiting since this thread started to hear the story, and all i get is nickname by co-workers!!!!!
the humanity
AlphaTroll
New Member
unclehobart said:
You did something bad to the office pet goldfish didn't you? Photocopied the poor thing to death's door for staring at you with his beady little eyes didn't you? And then flushed him to watch the poor little bugger try swimming upstream.....his little voice softly yelling "Is that you Moby? Where's the light? It's getting so dark in here" until his feeble attempts died down and he turned those round little eyes to you, with a last breath gasping "Why?"
unclehobart
New Member
ok... more teasers then.
Im 19 and am invited to a mega blowout party with coworkers in an aging, but huge, house in the west end old residential district from the 20s... you know the era. All houses are like frat house huge; 18 bedrooms and like only two bathrooms. There are like 12 people living in this house, 6 of them coworkers, all young, almost all in college or just past college. They are told by the owner that the whole area is going commercial and that the place had been sold to contractors and was undergoing voluntary condemnation. That meant that they had to vacate the premesis in 6 months... and that they could do whatever they wanted with the place so long as they didnt do anything overtly criminal like burn it down or breach the utilities. The place immediately turned into Animal House. They threw kegs through the windows, doors were ripped out and used as surfboards on the stairs, every exposed wall became a mecca for artwork.
I am a decent artist and immediately start doing various doodles with sharpies. After a while, I was dragged to the hall that was nothing but venting scribbles, philosiphy, and gibberish. I was told to do something that would blow everyones mind... so I scibbled out a joke. They said go farther... so I scribbled out some vexing rant. They said that I was holding back and needed to shock people... so I scribbled the first thing that came to mind that I knew would give them pause: Uncle Hobart likes tight young male buttocks! ... and then drew several pictures of homoerotic mishmash all around it. It blew them away all right and I had a crowd going ape behind me. Unfortunately, 3 of the colleges types were psyche majors and then proceeded to discuss the subconscious ramifications of what I had drawn. They came to the conclusion that it was all just an extention of my denied superego and that I was really a closet homosexual mass murderer ready to pop and slay the world. They said that I was in fact secretly calling myself Uncle Hobart within my twisted little fantasy world.
The next day, everyone was calling me Uncle Hobart... but I tried to deny the nickname. After 2 weeks had gone by, all 150 employees of the company was calling me 'hobart' ... but only a handful ever knew the reason behind it ... so I bent to fate and embraced the name. Within a month, noone remembered the reasons anymore... just the name. Everafter I was unclehobart to friends all over the world. When someone calls me by name, 80% of the time I hear 'hobart' instead of my birthname 'robby, robert'. I might as well legally change it.
Im 19 and am invited to a mega blowout party with coworkers in an aging, but huge, house in the west end old residential district from the 20s... you know the era. All houses are like frat house huge; 18 bedrooms and like only two bathrooms. There are like 12 people living in this house, 6 of them coworkers, all young, almost all in college or just past college. They are told by the owner that the whole area is going commercial and that the place had been sold to contractors and was undergoing voluntary condemnation. That meant that they had to vacate the premesis in 6 months... and that they could do whatever they wanted with the place so long as they didnt do anything overtly criminal like burn it down or breach the utilities. The place immediately turned into Animal House. They threw kegs through the windows, doors were ripped out and used as surfboards on the stairs, every exposed wall became a mecca for artwork.
I am a decent artist and immediately start doing various doodles with sharpies. After a while, I was dragged to the hall that was nothing but venting scribbles, philosiphy, and gibberish. I was told to do something that would blow everyones mind... so I scibbled out a joke. They said go farther... so I scribbled out some vexing rant. They said that I was holding back and needed to shock people... so I scribbled the first thing that came to mind that I knew would give them pause: Uncle Hobart likes tight young male buttocks! ... and then drew several pictures of homoerotic mishmash all around it. It blew them away all right and I had a crowd going ape behind me. Unfortunately, 3 of the colleges types were psyche majors and then proceeded to discuss the subconscious ramifications of what I had drawn. They came to the conclusion that it was all just an extention of my denied superego and that I was really a closet homosexual mass murderer ready to pop and slay the world. They said that I was in fact secretly calling myself Uncle Hobart within my twisted little fantasy world.
The next day, everyone was calling me Uncle Hobart... but I tried to deny the nickname. After 2 weeks had gone by, all 150 employees of the company was calling me 'hobart' ... but only a handful ever knew the reason behind it ... so I bent to fate and embraced the name. Within a month, noone remembered the reasons anymore... just the name. Everafter I was unclehobart to friends all over the world. When someone calls me by name, 80% of the time I hear 'hobart' instead of my birthname 'robby, robert'. I might as well legally change it.
paul_valaru
100% Pure Canadian Beef
unclehobart said:
wow your a homosexual serial killer?
thanks Unc.
AlphaTroll
New Member
No, he's a homosexual cereal killer - all his victims are found with weetbix up their arses 
Thanks alot AT.
unclehobart
New Member
Sure did. I don't remember what they put up there... after all, this was 15 years ago.
unclehobart
New Member
Look .... guys .... I said 'serial killer' ... not 'rapist'. One may be a homosexual serial killer and just kill. It doesn't mean automatic wheetabix up the arse.
unclehobart
New Member
Oh, I AM whacko... Tis no doubt about that. Just dig through my prior 9000 posts. Im a psychoanalysts wet dream.
unclehobart
New Member
No... its not that. I just cant find a steady supply of that particular Anglican brekkie bit here in Atlanta. lol
Now if you said something like Ty-phoo or Tips tea ... or even the odd jar of Marmite being used to roger my victims ... then it would be different.
Now if you said something like Ty-phoo or Tips tea ... or even the odd jar of Marmite being used to roger my victims ... then it would be different.
unclehobart
New Member
Dang... My Kroger doesn't carry too much exotic world foods. I guess that the population is large enough that there ae entire business built around specialty imports. I just fear that they are all the way downtown, which makes them too much of a pain to try and get to. The mass transit here is a joke... and parking is impossible.
unclehobart
New Member
That 'up the Hershey highway' bit was alphatrolls ... not mine. Imported delectibles would most assuredly go down my gullet, not used as weapons.
The gold dome is the state capital building. Atlantas skyline is ok. It doesnt compare to NYC or Chicago or Frisco.
The gold dome is the state capital building. Atlantas skyline is ok. It doesnt compare to NYC or Chicago or Frisco.