How To Impress A Woman..

AlphaTroll · Oct 10, 2003

Gotnolegs said:
I'm sure I can think of something...

Oh, I'm sure you can.........as long as it doesn't hurt [other people] I'd probably not be adverse to it.

Oz · Oct 10, 2003

unclehobart said:
So the question boils down to: scary woman or scary beer?

Scary beer pls

(I've had enough scary womem for one lifetime)

AlphaTroll · Oct 10, 2003

Oz said:
Scary beer pls

(I've had enough scary womem for one lifetime)

Teehee babe, somehow I think if a scary woman showed up bearing scary beers you'd not have much say in which one of the two you'd prefer

Oz · Oct 10, 2003

AlphaTroll said:
Teehee babe, somehow I think if a scary woman showed up bearing scary beers you'd not have much say in which one of the two you'd prefer

I'd drink the beers first.........

unclehobart · Oct 10, 2003

AlphaTroll said:
I'd take the scary beer - your mates won't give you shit forever if you confess to drinking an 'iffy' beer - might even make you hero for a day for having the guts to try it. But just mention, even in passing, that you've laid a scary chick and you'll have crap jokes thrown at you for life

You would think that wouldn't you... but my friends caught me drinking a Carlings Black Label back in 87 and I've yet to hear the end of it. My firends don't rag each other over their scary women... after all.. they all have skeletons in their closet. Its a matter of 'why complain about the splinter in your friends eye when you cannot see the log in your own?' It would end up being something like:
Them: Duuude... what is up with that scary piece I saw you with last night?
Me: Hey... it was only for one night. Yours ended up hanging around for FIVE FUCKING YEARS! ...and she stole half of your CDs on the way out the door to boot.

AlphaTroll · Oct 10, 2003

Oz said:
I'd drink the beers first.........

LOL - ye see that would be her plan of course, ah beer, helping ugly people have sex since whenever the hell ugly people discovered that beer is cheaper than cosmetic surgery and will improve their sex lives tenfold.....

Gotnolegs · Oct 10, 2003

unclehobart said:
You would think that wouldn't you... but my friends caught me drinking a Carlings Black Label back in 87 and I've yet to hear the end of it. My firends don't rag each other over their scary women... after all.. they all have skeletons in their closet. Its a matter of 'why complain about the splinter in your friends eye when you cannot see the log in your own?' It would end up being something like:
Them: Duuude... what is up with that scary piece I saw you with last night?
Me: Hey... it was only for one night. Yours ended up hanging around for FIVE FUCKING YEARS! ...and she stole half of your CDs on the way out the door to boot.

LOL! So true, I swear I'm never gonna get married again, I'm just gonna buy a woman I hate a house. Saves time...

Oz · Oct 10, 2003

AlphaTroll said:
LOL - ye see that would be her plan of course, ah beer, helping ugly people have sex since whenever the hell ugly people discovered that beer is cheaper than cosmetic surgery and will improve their sex lives tenfold.....

Yup

[sings]Thank fuck for ugly women
All the boilers, slags and whores
Just so they could get a shag
They invented alcohol [/sings]

Ah...........fond memories of a miss-spent youth

AlphaTroll · Oct 10, 2003

Gotnolegs said:
LOL! So true, I swear I'm never gonna get married again, I'm just gonna buy a woman I hate a house. Saves time...

And remember to throw in a car, clothing allowance and half your salary. Do that & I'd agree to NOT marry you in a wink.

paul_valaru · Oct 10, 2003

MizzFizzTheBizz said:
so what do reckon eh? The beer or flesh.

I can buy my own beer

freako104 · Oct 10, 2003

MizzFizzTheBizz said:
·Love her
·Comfort her
·Cherish her
·Protect her
·Kiss her
·Cuddle her
·Listen to her
·Support her
·Compliment her
·Respect her
·Care for her

How to impress a bloke:

·Show up naked
·Bring beer

rrfield · Oct 10, 2003

paul_valaru said:
I can buy my own beer

Amen. Beer, even good beer, is cheaper then finding a woman.

freako104 · Oct 10, 2003

AlphaTroll said:
And how to drive him insane enough to consider suicide..........tell him he can only have one of the two.....

thats an easy choice: take teh flesh!!

Kawaii · Oct 10, 2003

MizzFizzTheBizz said:
so what do reckon eh? The beer or flesh.

I'll take the flesh, and the joint i hid in my drawer.

SexyBoo · Oct 10, 2003

I would just have to find a way to combine the beer and the woman - I've seen several good examples already!

freako104 · Oct 10, 2003

yea but whipped cream is better

MizzFizzTheBizz · Oct 10, 2003

Kawaii said:
I'll take the flesh, and the joint i hid in my drawer.

that's a bit sneaky!! :devious:

tell you what sod the flesh..can i have some of that instead :smoke:

MrBishop · Oct 10, 2003

paul_valaru said:
I can buy my own beer

Where you been? You can buy your own woman too

and...you can enjoy a woman and drive afterwards

paul_valaru · Oct 10, 2003

MrBishop said:
Where you been? You can buy your own woman too

and...you can enjoy a woman and drive afterwards

I don't need to buy women, I get those for free.

it's the matinance plan that's fucking expensive

MizzFizzTheBizz · Oct 11, 2003

paul_valaru said:
I can buy my own beer

The Lads prayer

Our Beer
Which art in barrels
Hallowed be thy drink
Thy will be drunk
At home as it is in the local
Forgive us this day our daily spillage
As we forgive those that spillest against us
And lead us not into the poncey practise of wine tasting
And deliver us from alco-pops
For mine is the bitter
The ale and the lager
For ever and ever

Barmen.

How To Impress A Woman..

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