Fortune cookies
- Thread starter JJR512
- Start date
chcr
Too cute for words
I've gotten two interesting fortune cookie fortunes recently:
"Your fortune is in another cookie."
and
"If you gamble, it will be your downfall."
Now what made that second one so special is that printed right below that message were "[My] lucky numbers".
Didja play 'em? Huh? Huh? Didja?
paul_valaru
100% Pure Canadian Beef
I always read them, then add the words "in bed"
makes them funnier.
makes them funnier.
A.B.Normal
New Member
Now, that would be ignoring the cookie's cautioning message about gambling
Since they already gave you the winning numbers,it isn't gambling,its a sure thing.
MrBishop
Well-Known Member
[FONT=verdana, arial, helvetica, sans-serif] You find beauty in ordinary things, do not lose this ability...in bed
Ideas are like children; there are none so wonderful as your own...in bed
It takes more than good memory to have good memories..in bed
A thrilling time is in your immediate future...in bed
Well...funnier, sometimes.
[/FONT]
It doesn't have to be dirty... "Ideas are like children; there are none so wonderful as your own...in bed" could be that there are no children so wonderful as your own when they're sleeping. I often hear parents say that they rather enjoy the quiet time when their kids are sleeping...
BlurOfSerenity
New Member
"with a chainsaw" can also create some comedic gold
i have one that says, "you will always be surrounded by true friends" and another that says "true friends will always surround you"
i think one of my favorites was "don't worry, it will all be ok"
Inkara1
Well-Known Member
Actually, I take that particular "in bed" to be much, much dirtier than a lot of others. Like, FLDS dirty.
JJR512
New Member
Hmm... Let's take some guesses:
Fucking Like Dirty as Shit
Fucking Lovable Dirty Shit
Fucking Low-Down Shit
For Love of Dirty Shit
Foxy Lady Does ...umm, Shit?
Freaky Lewd Dirty Shit
Fucking Lucky Dirty Shorts
... Actually it's the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Why it's not FCJCLDS? Don't ask me. Or they could put in some extra letters, like the 'u' from the first word and then the 'o's from both 'of's and you'd have... FuCoJCoLDS, an acronym you can actually pronounce! "Hey, those fuckojcolds are at it again!"
Fucking Like Dirty as Shit
Fucking Lovable Dirty Shit
Fucking Low-Down Shit
For Love of Dirty Shit
Foxy Lady Does ...umm, Shit?
Freaky Lewd Dirty Shit
Fucking Lucky Dirty Shorts
... Actually it's the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Why it's not FCJCLDS? Don't ask me. Or they could put in some extra letters, like the 'u' from the first word and then the 'o's from both 'of's and you'd have... FuCoJCoLDS, an acronym you can actually pronounce! "Hey, those fuckojcolds are at it again!"
Thank you Inkara1 for turning me on to urbandictionary.com!
paul_valaru
100% Pure Canadian Beef
Inkara1
Well-Known Member
That ranch in Texas where they were marrying off girls and having them have babies at 13 or 14, then the feds came in and took the kids through some sort of God-awful conspiracy because it obviously must be a ploy to get more money for CPS... that was the Fundamentalist LDS church. They were doing it on the Arizona/Utah border but the law was catching up with them there so Warren Jeffs bought a giant ranch in Texas.