tonksy said:
First off everybody, I am Christian. A Christian who has spent a good deal of time living in a Catholic area. I admire the process of Lent and follow through with it as a means to put my religious beliefs and perspective in order.
Gothoholic and everyone else that just does not seem to get it - I have my beliefs. I believe that I am living in sin. I believe that I am fornicating. But I KNOW that Ron...er, ROB doesn't believe in God or marriage so the only way that I can remedy this situation is to leave him and I just don't believe that is what I am meant to do. I pray every night for forgiveness for the situation I am in (so don't tell me how to repent)....But the reality is that my life is more blessed in these past 2 years than it has been in the first 29. I refuse to believe that God wants me to leave. The Lord works in mysterious ways and I believe I am a tool of his. Only he can know his intent in this situation. I will continue to have my faith, REPENT FOR MY SINS, and do what I believe to be right....and incidently, I intend not to point out the stick in other peoples eyes while ignoring the plank in my own (something that other people might do well to do).
repent
1. To feel remorse, contrition, or self-reproach for what one has done or failed to do; be contrite.
2. To feel such regret for past conduct as to change one's mind regarding it:
repented of intemperate behavior.
3. To make a change for the better as a result of remorse or contrition for one's sins
As you can see, you of course do not
actually repent. No one would think it would be alright to say to another person (whether it be to your God or someone you know) that you are sorry for committing transgressions against him or her when you still have the intent of doing that same action later. No one would take your apology seriously because there is no true remorse. Rhetorically speaking, would you accept Rob’s apology for hitting you if he still had the intention of hitting you again?
You believe you are justified to “live in sin” with Rob because you believe God wants you to be with him. You can not rectify the situation because he does not believe in marriage? That is a pretty serious thing to choose to endure with your boyfriend. In order to not conflict with your religion all you really need to do is stop living with/fornicating with him. It sounds like you are putting your will before God’s will (you know that God doesn’t want you fornicate). But that is a serious issue you need to work on. All I’m saying is that you are wrong for trying to
repent for it when you clearly are not in a state of repentance.
tonksy said:
Gothoholic - you are now on my ignore list
That was a little too easy for me to make it there. Not so thick skinned, are we?
tonksy said:
but before I forget about you let me just say that I understand that you are trying to be a good Christian and a good witness. But if it is one thing I would have you know it is that you are going about it in the wrong way- the witness part anyway. To be a good witness means that you live a good life yourself and embrace other people and are understanding and offer compassion as well as counsel. You come across very holierthanthou in your approach, something that is never welcome and is never true.
I would like to point out that I did not lash out at you. I was straight forward and told it like it is. You claimed you repent when you clearly were not doing so.
It seems what you are trying to say is that I (and all Christians) should hold my tongue if someone is sinning. That is only true if I were to be committing equal or
greater sins myself. It is actually not Christian like to hold my tongue. I will explain myself at the end of this post…
tonksy said:
All sins are equal in the eyes of the Lord
That is not true at all. You really think a kid whole stole a candy bar from a store is equal in sin to a guy who raped a woman? All sins are not equal. There are venial and mortal sins.
tonksy said:
and no one is without sin, except for Jesus. That is the basic tenet of Christian belief. I struggle with my sin and your struggle with yours and we help each other along the way.
That is true. But I can’t help you and you can’t help me if we are silent about our sins.
So, in keeping silent that your version of “repentance” is wrong and being silent explaining why it is so does not help you.
tonksy said:
We also cannot know of Gods plan. I wil not go into how marriage was created by man well after the 10 Commandments were passed down and even after the birth of Christ, that is really not the issue.
I would like to see you back that up.
tonksy said:
If you think for one minute that I am turning a blind eye to my situation than you are wrong...not to mention insulting to me.
I think you are trying to rationalize why you are “living in sin”.
Nixy said:
Tonks, he may be trying to be a good CATHOLIC but he isn't being a good CHRISTIAN...not in the eyes of EVERY Christian religion anyway. My church EMBRACES unwed parents, single parents, unmarried couples. Actually, my church embraces everyone who is a kind, loving, thoughtful, generous, etc. person. We believe that we are here to do God's work in the sense of helping others, loving others, living a fulfilling life, etc.
Gotholic: Catholicism is NOT the only Christian religion and not every Christian religion shares the Catholic view of sex and other such things. So while it may be a Christian belief to repent for ones sins in some Christian religions living together without being married is NOT as deadly of a sin as you're making it out to be, infact in some it's a non-issue. So, take your preachy way ELSEWHERE because we don't wanna hear it.
There are various Bible verses that speak against fornication. For instance, in 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, it says that fornicators will not inherit the kingdom of God. It is heavy indeed. But I’m not arguing against fornication here. Most Christians know it is wrong and a lot do it anyway. I’m just saying that is totally wrong for tonksy to repent for her sin of fornication when she still has the intent of doing it.
Professur said:
I'd just (21) like to add a side note. Tonks "is" married, according to "Catholic" dogma. I don't believe that she's been granted a divorce by the pope. Therefore, Goth, would you have her compound her sin with polygamy?
If that is true then I’m not sure. I would think it would be more of adultery than polygamy.
tonksy said:
I just find it odd that's my situation's not a problem until I mention the slightest hint of religious belief. Then people come out of the woodwork to push me down and talk about what a huge sinner I am. Well yeah, duh, I am a sinner. So are we all. How is it remotely Christian to act in that manner? OOH OOH I'm a bigger Christian than you. God likes me more
I'm not saying I'm better than you. I'm saying it is wrong that you repent for something you still have the intent on doing because that is not really repenting.
To all those who accuse me of “judging” and believe I’m going against Christian teaching:
It is not “judging” when a Christian speaks out against a sinful activity. Jesus told us not to judge
hypocritically, when he told us not to judge (Matthew 7:1). Jesus says, "For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, Let me take the speck out of your eye when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." (Matthew 7:2-5)
In Matthew 2:2-5, Jesus warns not to judge others when you have committed the same or greater sins they have committed. This is the kind of judging we are not to do. It is a Christian duty to confront someone who is sinning with respect and love about their sin.
For the record, I do not repent for my sins that I have the intent on committing again and I do not fornicate. I also did not lash out at tonksy.
This is not really judging but pointing out the truth in hopes of repentance.
“If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother. But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact my be confirmed. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.” (Matthew 18:15-17)
“Let him know that he who turns a sinner from the error of his way will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.” (James 5:20)
2 Timothy 4:2 instructs us, "Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage — with great patience and careful instruction."
You have a vivid imagination hun
Much as I'd like to be the knight in shining armor, I feel she handled the situation with a lot of intelligence and compassion. That, and I think most of us think the same way. 
