the dirt was a nasty oil spill from the tank that's right behind, the grass just won't grow there, the crater is from a dog/Dr. Destructo combo demolition team, it keeps coming back
That reminds me of the time my girlfriends and I got our guys to dress up in short shirts and suspenders and dragged 'em off down the local pub. (Tarts and Vicars Party) When my ex walked in who should he meet but all his mates from the local biker club(The National Chopper Club). Now that WAS hilarious especially their faces, I don't think he ever lived it down.