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[SouthernN'Proud]

Quit changin pics on me Bish!

 

[Inkara1]

Best babysitter ever! It shows up on time, costs a lot less... of course, when it's time to take the baby back, it gets to be a rather, umm, sticky situation.

 

[BB]

winna Wii competition 2 ...

 

[MrBishop]

Hold your Wee one, for a Wii, won ?

 

[MrBishop]

..

 

[Gato_Solo]

No nipple?!? How am I supposed to nurse this beer with no nipple...

 

[SouthernN'Proud]

The service in this place sucks...I'm gonna run out of beer before my wings even get here!

 

[Inkara1]

Whoever placed that sweet, sweet nectar just barely out of my reach will BURN IN HELL!!!!!!!!!!

 

[MrBishop]

Mmmm...freshly picked bacon

 

[Luis G]

 

[SouthernN'Proud]

That tastes worse than what comes out of MY nose...

 

[MrBishop]

mmm....tastes like chicken....snot

 

[SouthernN'Proud]

How the hell am I gonna get that out of there with a 7 iron?

 

[markjs]

OK, that's it, I am calling the cops on my asshole neighbor for indecent exposure shrubbery! Lock him up and throw away the key boys!

 

[markjs]

"OK mom....wean me will you? You'll PAY!"

or

"Stop moving ya stupid dog!"

 

[markjs]

"Damn that was good shit! Columbian or homegrown?"

 

[markjs]

"In Homedawg We Trust"

"I think we need to institute a drug testing policy at the mint mr. President!"

"Presenting the 2050 Fiddy cent piece!"

 

[markjs]

President Bush at the State of The Union Address 2008: (ignoring the teleprompter he so desparately needs): "No more Mr. nice guys, 'merica has a new top-secretiveness type of weapon of personal destructionitivity!....Don't misunderestimate us no more! We're sending in Charles...." *secret serviceman whispers in his ear* "Sending in Chuck Norris! Astala-sayanara! Bin Laden, prepare to meet your genesis...." *secret servicemen whispers in his ear* "Nemesis!" *confused applause* " 'merica, will not tolorate malevolentivity from foreign agents of criminalistical organizations dedicated to terror and destructivity no damn longer!" *a few people clap* *crickets* *silence* (He steps down from the podium) *Wild applause from the right side of the aisle.....Confused blank stares mixed with shocked looks of horror from the left*

 

[markjs]

"How convenient! I never knew what those things were for till now!"

"If you han't been such brats in the car...."

"OMG....Mrs. Duck will have my balls for this!"

 

[markjs]

"Because at John Deere, we are sensitive to the needs of the gay farmer with a sore ass, our new line of tractors without seats....."

*crickets*

"Since we have moved our headquarters to San Francisco and started hiring bay area residents, sales are down 350%, I wonder why?"

*more crickets join in*

Adam to his gay husband Steve: "That new lawnmower you got was just fabulous! I just wish you'd have got the mauve one instead of chartruse. Maybe next year they'll come out in pastel pink and we can get a new one...."

*a veritable cricket convention is gathering*