Altron
Well-Known Member
Well, Friday night, I started typing this wonderful rant on my job, only to be thwarted by the electricity people.
I did manage to save it, but not to post it. For the most part, this is the first chance I've gotten to spend time not at work since Wednsday, so here goes:
My boss doesn't have a sick sense of humor.
We have this thing called the Daily Mix, where they give you a 'pep talk' e-mail for the day. It has stories from the day before, a joke or trivia, and then things to work on today, along with who will be the floor manager at what times.
So, since the people yesterday didn't send the guy an e-mail about stories for that day, he didn't have a daily mix out this morning. Since I was around yesterday, I got to pretty much write it. I wanted to put in that "poker face" joke, the one with the $500, and he was kinda pissed off. He said that it has to be something workplace appropriate and kinda stupid. A lot of times they do trivia and say to e-mail them. Today's trivia was, I kid you not, "Who can tell me the meaning of 'condiscending' and use it in a sentance", to which I was like "First, there's only one "I" in it, and second, everyone knows what it means, hell, it pretty much defines the relationship between me and the technology manager. Put my joke back in."
And to my combined horror and surprise, plenty of people didn't know what it meant.
Of course, I am a bit concerned about the daily mix making my a little vain. Since I was pretty much in charge of dictating it, I was supposed to think of two "customer service heros" for the day. One of my coworkers stayed an hour late to help out because really shitty scheduling (nobody called out, they just -didn't- schedule anyone for like an hour and a half in the warehouse, so one of the CS people needed to do warehouse, so one of the merch people needed to do CS), so she got in. I was gonna do the guy who spent the day wiring up a TV display, but apparantly that's part of his job responsibility, and they wanted going above and beyond. So I was like "Well, I stayed a bit late to help warehouse clean up so they could polish the floors, is that alright?" and it was, although, since I didn't physically write it, it came out all wrong. I wanted it to say something like "____ and ___ in warehouse with _____ from merch worked hard to clear out the back of the warehouse for the floors to get polished" but it ended up being "_____ from merch worked hard to clear out the back of the warehouse". I mean, I did work hard, and it wasn't my job. But I didn't do nearly as much work as the two guys whose job it was. They spent like 3-4 hours each, I spent like one hour, just to finish up because they were tired.
I did manage to get my favorite line of bullshit in there, "opening avenues of communication to enrich the customer journey". That's what I love about dry sarcasm, it slips through "work-appropriate" screening very well. Instead of bitching, I just take the bullshit jargon that the managers tell us, reword it, and toss it right back.
And of course, my name is on the bottom, right after "today's daily mix brought to you by"
I really hope it doesn't sound too narcissistic, especially considering that I'm a customer service hero again for tomarrow's daily mix, although this time, I actually deserved it, because I worked my balls off.
The reason I wanted to get in the first one was that one of my coworkers who typically bitches a lot about working and always wants to go home early got in the daily mix not once, but twice, this week.
First time, he decided to re-print tags for all the games, and sort them out. He started on it, and went home. While he was working on it, I helped him with about half, and once he left, I finished it.
Second time, he came in on his day off to cover Madden 07 release, and worked on the register.
Now, I offered to come in that day and help, and was told that we would have enough people.
Covering the register? One of my coworkers and I cover the register on a daily basis. On average, I spend about an hour a day on it, covering for breaks, or reducing the line, and occasionally spending the entire day on it, covering for people who called out. Same one who stayed an hour late on the register yesterday to cover people. Never got in the daily mix for that. Of course, my favorite is the classic bait and switch, where they tell me to come on for five minutes so that they can go to the bathroom, then never return.
I gotta remember to take that issue up with management. Merch is understaffed. We don't mind covering the register if neccessary, but we are NOT a permanent replacement. If someone's taking an hour long break, fine, we can cover it. If someone's going home at five and the store closes at ten, completely un-fucking-acceptable.
Just because we don't have big ticket sales doesn't mean that we don't need fuckin' sales people. For a solid hour today, the department was not staffed at all, because I had to go on register and for all but about 4 hours in the morning, where it was me and a coworker, I was the only person in the department for a 12 hour day.
CSA 1 "Hey, can you hop in register?"
Me "I can get on for a minute or two if you need to go to the bathroom, but I'm the only person in Merch, and I need to cover the floor."
CSA 1 "Ok, it will be real quick"
-1 hour later-
Me "Where did CSA 1 go?"
CSA 2 "Oh, he went home awhile ago"
Me "Can you get someone else up here so I can cover the floor?"
CSA 2 "Yeah, we'll send someone up in like ten minutes"
I kid you not, that actually happened today.
I did manage to save it, but not to post it. For the most part, this is the first chance I've gotten to spend time not at work since Wednsday, so here goes:
My boss doesn't have a sick sense of humor.
We have this thing called the Daily Mix, where they give you a 'pep talk' e-mail for the day. It has stories from the day before, a joke or trivia, and then things to work on today, along with who will be the floor manager at what times.
So, since the people yesterday didn't send the guy an e-mail about stories for that day, he didn't have a daily mix out this morning. Since I was around yesterday, I got to pretty much write it. I wanted to put in that "poker face" joke, the one with the $500, and he was kinda pissed off. He said that it has to be something workplace appropriate and kinda stupid. A lot of times they do trivia and say to e-mail them. Today's trivia was, I kid you not, "Who can tell me the meaning of 'condiscending' and use it in a sentance", to which I was like "First, there's only one "I" in it, and second, everyone knows what it means, hell, it pretty much defines the relationship between me and the technology manager. Put my joke back in."
And to my combined horror and surprise, plenty of people didn't know what it meant.
Of course, I am a bit concerned about the daily mix making my a little vain. Since I was pretty much in charge of dictating it, I was supposed to think of two "customer service heros" for the day. One of my coworkers stayed an hour late to help out because really shitty scheduling (nobody called out, they just -didn't- schedule anyone for like an hour and a half in the warehouse, so one of the CS people needed to do warehouse, so one of the merch people needed to do CS), so she got in. I was gonna do the guy who spent the day wiring up a TV display, but apparantly that's part of his job responsibility, and they wanted going above and beyond. So I was like "Well, I stayed a bit late to help warehouse clean up so they could polish the floors, is that alright?" and it was, although, since I didn't physically write it, it came out all wrong. I wanted it to say something like "____ and ___ in warehouse with _____ from merch worked hard to clear out the back of the warehouse for the floors to get polished" but it ended up being "_____ from merch worked hard to clear out the back of the warehouse". I mean, I did work hard, and it wasn't my job. But I didn't do nearly as much work as the two guys whose job it was. They spent like 3-4 hours each, I spent like one hour, just to finish up because they were tired.
I did manage to get my favorite line of bullshit in there, "opening avenues of communication to enrich the customer journey". That's what I love about dry sarcasm, it slips through "work-appropriate" screening very well. Instead of bitching, I just take the bullshit jargon that the managers tell us, reword it, and toss it right back.
And of course, my name is on the bottom, right after "today's daily mix brought to you by"
I really hope it doesn't sound too narcissistic, especially considering that I'm a customer service hero again for tomarrow's daily mix, although this time, I actually deserved it, because I worked my balls off.
The reason I wanted to get in the first one was that one of my coworkers who typically bitches a lot about working and always wants to go home early got in the daily mix not once, but twice, this week.
First time, he decided to re-print tags for all the games, and sort them out. He started on it, and went home. While he was working on it, I helped him with about half, and once he left, I finished it.
Second time, he came in on his day off to cover Madden 07 release, and worked on the register.
Now, I offered to come in that day and help, and was told that we would have enough people.
Covering the register? One of my coworkers and I cover the register on a daily basis. On average, I spend about an hour a day on it, covering for breaks, or reducing the line, and occasionally spending the entire day on it, covering for people who called out. Same one who stayed an hour late on the register yesterday to cover people. Never got in the daily mix for that. Of course, my favorite is the classic bait and switch, where they tell me to come on for five minutes so that they can go to the bathroom, then never return.
I gotta remember to take that issue up with management. Merch is understaffed. We don't mind covering the register if neccessary, but we are NOT a permanent replacement. If someone's taking an hour long break, fine, we can cover it. If someone's going home at five and the store closes at ten, completely un-fucking-acceptable.
Just because we don't have big ticket sales doesn't mean that we don't need fuckin' sales people. For a solid hour today, the department was not staffed at all, because I had to go on register and for all but about 4 hours in the morning, where it was me and a coworker, I was the only person in the department for a 12 hour day.
CSA 1 "Hey, can you hop in register?"
Me "I can get on for a minute or two if you need to go to the bathroom, but I'm the only person in Merch, and I need to cover the floor."
CSA 1 "Ok, it will be real quick"
-1 hour later-
Me "Where did CSA 1 go?"
CSA 2 "Oh, he went home awhile ago"
Me "Can you get someone else up here so I can cover the floor?"
CSA 2 "Yeah, we'll send someone up in like ten minutes"
I kid you not, that actually happened today.
