liberal agenda

chcr

chcr

Too cute for words
Liberal Agenda for today

8:00 – Wake up. Hug tree.

8:10 – Quick breakfast of Wheaties w/ banana and unborn fetuses, stem cells spread on toast.

8:20 – Get dressed in hemp suit.

8:30 – Miscellaneous worship of false idols.

8:45 - Drive to methadone clicnic in hybrid car; 30% electric, 70% Bible furnace.

8:50 – Receive methadone. Sell for pot.

9:00 – Catch up on a little reading: Torah, Koran, Book of Mormon, other books not The Bible.

10:00 – Stop on way to welfare office to drown puppies.

10:20 – Pickup welfare check.

10:30 – Cash check.

10:35 – Buy more pot.

11:30 – Miscellaneous Sodomy.

12:00 – Light lunch of sushi and stem cell pie, plus cappuccino, at upscale coffee shop.

12:30 – Stop at nearest cemetery to bleach flags on veterans' graves.

1:30 – Miscellaneous coveting.

3:00 – Steal babies, throw them from bridge.

3:30 – Bomb a church.

4:00 – Meeting with Jews for instructions on what news stories to run today.

5:00 – Formal dinner/fundraiser of virgin Christian sacrifice. Guest speakers Michael Moore, Al Franken, Satan, and Bizarro Ann Coulter.

6:30 – Smoke cigars lit by a burning pictures of Jesus

6:45 – Infiltrate the school system to attract impressionable young student to the homosexual lifestyle.

7:00 – Miscellaneous taking the Lord's name in vain.

7:10 – Smoke pot.

7:15 – Giggle for about twenty minutes.

7:35 – Order pizza with extra cheese and stem cells.

8:00 – Pay pizza man in food stamps.

8:30 – Watch Real Time with Bill Maher.

9:30 – Bedtime snack of nachos with three kind of cheese and peppers. No stem cells, watching weight.

10:00 – Miscellaneous dishonor of mother and father.

10:30 – Early bedtime, need rest for tomorrow's All-Day Sodomy Fest.
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That's much too violoent for a liberal. Must have been written by a pissed off liberal looking to act like what he thinks a Republican would write like.
 
Being a conservative requires continuing the transformation of old ideas into new applications. We can take a cue from George W. Bush, who described for the new midshipmen what "transformation" means in the military. In Afghanistan, our troops rode into battle on horseback to maneuver the tough terrain, but the "cavalry" was guided by advanced satellite communications when it called in air strikes: "They combined a staple of 19th century warfare with the most advanced 21st century technology." Winston Churchill got it right first: "The farther back you look, the farther forward you see." That's the secret of the conservative renaissance
 
Can't take him anywhere...

AL FRANKEN OVERSTAYS WELCOME AT TALK FEST
Mon Jun 13 2005 08:31:35 ET

AIR AMERICA's Al Franken became “The Guest Who Wouldn’t Leave” after receiving an award at a talk-radio convention in New York over the weekend.

NY POST's John Mainelli reports Monday: The liberal talk-show host was finally forced off the stage -- amidst shouts from supporters and detractors -- after an acceptance speech became a nearly half-hour rant against Bill O’Reilly and the Iraq war.

“Al, hurry up,” said Michael Harrison, publisher of TALKERS mag, the convention sponsor.

“It’s freedom of speech,” said Franken, referring to the Freedom of Speech Award he’d just been given by the magazine.

“It’s not freedom to kill everybody’s evening, so why don’t you wrap it up,” Harrison argued.

“I’m talking about the war in Iraq and I have about two pages left, and I think the people in Walter Reed [Army Medical Center] who’ve been injured deserve the last two pages of my speech,” Franken countered.

“There are people walking out,” said Harrison. “We gave you the award and it’s time to leave.”

“Everyone who wants to leave can leave,” said Franken, addressing hundreds of talk-show hosts and radio execs at a cocktail reception in a downtown hotel.

“Now don’t leave!” Harrison urged the attendees. “We honored you. Now honor us. Don’t kill our party.”

With that -- while some shouted “keep going, keep going” and “let him finish” -- the Air America star wound down his rant by talking about his visits with Iraq-war vets.

“The soldiers were so magnificent,” Franken said, appearing to suppress sobs.

Developing...
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Winky said:
Winston Churchill got it right first: "The farther back you look, the farther forward you see." That's the secret of the conservative renaissance
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If you don't learn from the mistakes of the past, you are doomed to repeat them.

Doing the same thing with different tools isn't progress, it's just a faster way to do it (efficiency). Better to do new things with the same tools (efficacy).


**btw - The Renaissance was a great cultural movement which brought about a period of scientific revolution and artistic transformation. It was a cultural leap forward and away from the past. I don't think that your statement and Bush's meet the criteria.
 
Us writers like it when people enjoy our work and share it with other people, we just like it mroe when we're properly credited for it.


Please, everyone, don't forget to properly credit things when you use them. =)

(What can I say? I'm a whore.)

http://www.ubersite.com/m/67824
 
And he ain't even the fricken author
that's what makes it even funnier!


Submitted by Spooner (View user info) at 2005-06-05 09:12:20

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I found this while walking home from the movies last night. It's the Liberals' agenda for today, June 5, 2005. Let's look and see what a day is like for the Liberals of America...
 
I think the real author was either Howard Dean (he's the leader of the Democrats, so it makes sense) or Satan (he's the leader of the Democrats, so it makes sense).



(Just in case it needs clarification, when I say "I found this walking home from the movie last night," it doesn't mean I actually found it while walking home from the movies, it's just a way of explaining how the agenda got into my hands. I'm not sure if some of you actually think I found it walking home from the movies.)
 
Spooner said:
Us writers like it when people enjoy our work and share it with other people, we just like it mroe when we're properly credited for it.


Please, everyone, don't forget to properly credit things when you use them. =)

(What can I say? I'm a whore.)

http://www.ubersite.com/m/67824
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I'm sorry, someone e-mailed it to me and didn't attribute it. I apologize. :) I try to attribute or post links whenever I have them (I'm not above forgetting, but I try).
 
Nature of the beast. Once something like this starts making the joke e-mail rounds, it becomes sorta public domain by default. Not right and regrettable, perhaps, but all too common.

God knows how many times we've all passed on something like that without ever knowing the author.
 
Spooner said:
(Just in case it needs clarification, when I say "I found this walking home from the movie last night," it doesn't mean I actually found it while walking home from the movies, it's just a way of explaining how the agenda got into my hands. I'm not sure if some of you actually think I found it walking home from the movies.)
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:rofl4:
 
chcr said:
I'm sorry, someone e-mailed it to me and didn't attribute it. I apologize. :) I try to attribute or post links whenever I have them (I'm not above forgetting, but I try).
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Right right, and I didn't think you plagiarized it cause no one puts something they wrote in quotes, but still. =P


I can't wait to be out-and-out plagiarized though, where someone takes and outright claims to have written it. I'll ride in on my golden horse "On guard, ye scoundral!" and we'll fence, and I'll win, cause I weild a kickass saber.
 
Gonz said:
That's much too violoent for a liberal. Must have been written by a pissed off liberal looking to act like what he thinks a Republican would write like.
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By the way, this is startlingly accurate.
 
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