The good ol' 1 night stand (Question for the ladies)
- Thread starter MrBishop
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a13antichrist
New Member
BeardofPants said:And they aren't.Dunno what the frenchie was going on about.
No, they're not. What I said about NZers goes for Cannucks & AMericans too.
BeardofPants said:
Was it worth what? What did you lose? What did it cost you? Maybe you consider yourself something less of a person now because you had sex with someone you weren't in love with? Interesting how that falls precisely in line with what I said about NZers before. Talk about retarded.
a13antichrist
New Member
MrBishop said:
Penes and vaginas have no sense of vengeance or emotions or even, though most males may disagree, duty. From a physical point of view sex is about rubbing & squirting, and asking about sincerity of anything in this regard is like asking "how 13 is an apple?"
AlladinSane
Well-Known Member
*gasp* made me spill my drink, ROFL . I would give you some karma for that, but the Karma icon strangely poofed out...tommyj27 said:
BeardofPants
New Member
a13antichrist said:
Nooooo....
It wasn't worth it because:
a) I cheated on my partner
b) It was a lousy lay
Which leads into...
c) Wasn't worth almost breaking up over one lousy lay.
I don't see the bit where I employed a "use me" complex.
Now retard this:
BeardofPants
New Member
freako104 said:BoP we all make mistakes. we still lubb joo.glad it all worked out for ya love
Tya Freakie
BeardofPants said:Nooooo....
It wasn't worth it because:
a) I cheated on my partner
b) It was a lousy lay
Which leads into...
c) Wasn't worth almost breaking up over one lousy lay.
I don't see the bit where I employed a "use me" complex.
Now retard this:
This sounds familiar............were ya drunk?
BeardofPants
New Member
Something like that.... 
a13antichrist
New Member
BeardofPants said:Nooooo....
It wasn't worth it because:
a) I cheated on my partner
b) It was a lousy lay
Which leads into...
c) Wasn't worth almost breaking up over one lousy lay.
I don't see the bit where I employed a "use me" complex.
Ok you're excused the "use me" retardation.
However you're also unfairly condemning one-night sex. It's not the one-nighter that caused your problem, it was your inability to remain faithful to your partner. Don't go blaming circumstances that had nothing to do with it.
scarlet
New Member
Right, she wasn't "condemning" one night stands at all ...She isn't saying that all one-night sex is bad and wrong .... just that it wasn't worth it for her. The circumstances had everything to do with it FOR HER!! Of course the one-nighter caused the problem. She cheated on him, yeah. It was the EVENT by which she cheated on him. Which in effect made her feel Bad about cheating on him. (even worse because it was lousy??heh)In turn, Feeling that overall, it wasn't worth it.
Her relationship was worth more to her, than an insignificant act of lust - therefore - it wasn't worth it.
Sure, if she hadn't cheated on him she wouldn't have had the problem of regretting cheating on her partner. Thats true - but its also besides the point- because the quality of the act and how she felt after the act were the entire reason why she says it wasn't worth it.
Ill also point out that she also regretted because it was lousy!, yeah.... maybe it, dare I say, would've been a tad less regretable if it was fantastic??
If you had sex with someone that meant nothing to you - and it was lousy - wouldn't you say it wasn't worth it?......If sex is an act of pleasure - and you recieved no pleasure from it - what was the point?
To get the other person off? And if so, why be so selfless with someone you don't have any attatchment to?
Well maybe things are all different from a female perspective?
ME? Id rather stay home with me vibe than have bad sex.....sloppy, impulsive, messy, insignificant, one night sex where all the guy cares about is getting himself off and pays little attention to what you want... I think that applies to most women... There is nothing worse than that....what satisfaction do you get? zilch
And this being "used" thing is pathetic. There are girls out there who think like that true... but
Me? I don't "feel used" if a guy does that, I get angry! (or just re-affirm my belief that most men have no idea when it comes to sex, and how to really please a women so I also can't help forming feelings of pity....)
In fact, I'd rather stay home with a vibrator. It has a 200% guarantee. Ha. or 3 or 4 or 500 (ha, ha)
Anyway, After a one-night stand, with the associated consequences and feelings and situations that come back to haunt you, theres no wonder people end up regreting ever doing it.
It is a fact that most people who have impulsive, one night stands - regret it afterwards. For whatever reasons..... not neccesarily the act, but everything that comes with it.
It is important to realise that regretting it has more to do with the circumstances and consequences directly linked to the act. Not the physical act. And therefore by saying it wasn't worth it - means that the one night of passion (or shall we say 'lack' of ! ) was not worth what comes out of doing it...
Not because on-night sex is 'wrong' or 'not worth it' as an act in itself
So anyway, I come back to this, All she said was that in her experience - it wasn't worth it. Simple as that.
BeardofPants
New Member
Wow, that was eloquently said, Scarlet. And it means I don't have to type up the diatribe myself. Welcome to OTC. (and lots of karma! )
(and lots of karma! )
Hey thanks for the welcome, I think I am going to really enjoy being a part of this thing.
AlphaTroll
New Member
a13antichrist
New Member
scarlet said:
No, you're missing the significance. The fact that it was a one-night stand is irrelevant, and by itself would have caused NO harm whatsoever. If it was a regular shag with an ex-bf instead of a one-nighter it still would have caused the same problem with her partner. This thread is about the worthwhile-ness of one-night stands, and in this case whether it was a one-nighter or not was irrelevant - the problem was caused by the simple fact that it happened OCCURENCE, not because of its nature.
Besides which, her statement gives the clear indication that she has decided one-night stands are aa bad thing, because of the problems this one time caused her. That's the same as saying "Lemonade is bad. I gave some to my son once and it made me crash the car." The lemonade is irrelevant - it was the fact that he spat it in your face while you were driving that caused the problem.
scarlet said:
No, the fact that she regretted cheating on her partner was why it wasn't worth it.
scarlet said:
Besides the fact that you just repeated yourself, think for two seconds about what you actually just said. If your partner found out you'd just cheated on him, do you think it'd make him feel better if you said, "oh it's ok though, it was really GOOD sex"? Would you feel less guilty about having done it if it was really good sex? Hardly. Don't be absurd.
True, there probably is no point. "Not worth it" though implies that the costs outweighed the gains - and unless it actually physically hurt, you haven't ever lost anything at all through lousy sex (except perhaps a few hours' sleep) - might not have gained anything either, so it was pointless, but that's not the same thing as not worth it. If it cost you $20 to get a taxi home from his place, then yeah, wouldn't be worth it.
It is a fact that people who a) are retards or b) can't stop themselves cheating, end up regretting it. And as you say, IT'S NOT THE ACT, but everything that comes with it. And "bad stuff" only comes with it if you're cheating or are a retard.
[quoteIt is important to realise that regretting it has more to do with the circumstances and consequences directly linked to the act. Not the physical act. And therefore by saying it wasn't worth it - means that the one night of passion (or shall we say 'lack' of ! ) was not worth what comes out of doing it... [/quote]
No shit. So what she said does not belong in this context. A thread on cheating, yeah - "I cheated once, it wasn't worth it" - would definitely be relevant - but not here. Think Lemonade. What she said portrays erroneous impressions of her opinion of one-night sex. As you said, it's not the act of one-night sex that she regrets, but the results of her cheating.
In any case the reason it was shitty was most likely because she felt guilty about cheating on her partner at the time. The only thing that is beside the point is that it was a one-night stand.
AlphaTroll
New Member
A13, you seem to be missing the point more than anyone else - the thread IMO is whether or not we (as individuals) feel that one night stands are for us, something we enjoy or would do on a regular basis.
Hence it calls for personal opinion & as such has bugger all to do with whether we are made in such a way that our bodily parts serve merely as sexual organs. If you like bonking everything in sight & are able to do so without any emotional baggage, hey kuddos to you, that's your perogative.
Seems the rest of us (or at least the majority of the ladies here) view sex as a meaningful part of their relationships & for that reason one night stands aren't something we'd choose to do. Think Lemonade - all of us don't like it, but we don't really give a shit one way or the other if anyone else does.
Hence it calls for personal opinion & as such has bugger all to do with whether we are made in such a way that our bodily parts serve merely as sexual organs. If you like bonking everything in sight & are able to do so without any emotional baggage, hey kuddos to you, that's your perogative.
Seems the rest of us (or at least the majority of the ladies here) view sex as a meaningful part of their relationships & for that reason one night stands aren't something we'd choose to do. Think Lemonade - all of us don't like it, but we don't really give a shit one way or the other if anyone else does.