Bitch about work thread.
- Thread starter Altron
- Start date
Ok, but don't keep asking over and over and over. People do and have used the "I'm busy" line so they don't have to come out and say "No". Sometimes they're actually busy and wanna go and sometimes they don't wanna go at all.
Professur
Well-Known Member
Yup. Thursday's my thought. If you're going to a movie ... thursday's the break day for this week. If you haven't decided by then, you're not going.
Altron
Well-Known Member
So, what I'm supposed to ask is -
Is she still interested in the offer, and if so, what day is good? What movie would she like to see?
I'm going to be casual and friendly about it. It's not a date, it's friends seeing a movie together. If that works nicely, maybe friends will see another movie. If that still works nicely, maybe friends will go out on a date. Or maybe friends will continue to be friends, and not go out on a date.
I don't want to put her in an uncomfortable position. I really like her as a person. I'd rather not make her feel weird by trying to push for a date.
So, I'll give it a few days, then let her know that my offer's still good, and see if she knows of any movies she would like to see, or if not a movie, maybe she wants to do something else.
Is she still interested in the offer, and if so, what day is good? What movie would she like to see?
I'm going to be casual and friendly about it. It's not a date, it's friends seeing a movie together. If that works nicely, maybe friends will see another movie. If that still works nicely, maybe friends will go out on a date. Or maybe friends will continue to be friends, and not go out on a date.
I don't want to put her in an uncomfortable position. I really like her as a person. I'd rather not make her feel weird by trying to push for a date.
So, I'll give it a few days, then let her know that my offer's still good, and see if she knows of any movies she would like to see, or if not a movie, maybe she wants to do something else.
Professur
Well-Known Member
If you leave it til thursday, personally, I'd just casually ask if she'd found any movie that interested her. Very open ended, y'see? It doesn't corner her. She's got the option to just tell you no, to beg off (in which case, you don't ask again), to say not yet, which implies that she's interested, but actually hasn't found anything yet, or to tell you yes.
Don't embellish beyond that question :Found a movie that interests you? Don't say ... yet on the end. That implies impatience on your part.
Don't embellish beyond that question :Found a movie that interests you? Don't say ... yet on the end. That implies impatience on your part.
Altron
Well-Known Member
I didn't bring up anything else about the movies.
We chatted for some time, and she mentioned that she missed seeing me (I was off for a couple of days).
The thing is, I'm friends with her best friend and her best friend's boyfriend, and they're more than a little bit forward about it. They kinda casually refer to the two of us as a couple.
The next time I'm seeing 18 is on Saturday, at a party. I'm seeing 23 on Friday.
I need to hit on 23 ASAP. If I can get a decent reply out of her, I can break it off with 18 without hurting her feelings.
Don't get me wrong, I like 18. Exactly in the same sense that I like Sawhney89. She's a great girl, and a good friend. Am I into her? Not really. I hang out with her, have a decent time, and completely forget about her for a month or so.
I like her, and like hanging out with her. I don't exactly want to go out with her, but I don't want to hurt her feelings.
I've been hanging out with her for years, and I've never really been interested. She's had plenty of boyfriends during that time, all of them artfully concealed from me. She danced with a few of my buddies at various middle school dances, but she never seemed to have a boyfriend during high school. I find out that she does have one only through one of our mutual friends, six weeks into their relationship. Then, at the same party, we were discussing who has gone through the most relationships, and her friends unanimously picked her.
I'm a bit concerned, because the only reason I said yes when 18 asked me out was because she liked me, not because I liked her. Even taking 23 out of the picture, I would never have asked 18 out. I should have told her that I just wanted to be friends with her, not go out with her, when she asked. I was a jerk. I knew that I wasn't all that interested, and I said 'yes'. I don't know how long you can date someone who you don't have any romantic intrest whatsoever in, but I don't imagine that it's a very long time.
We chatted for some time, and she mentioned that she missed seeing me (I was off for a couple of days).
The thing is, I'm friends with her best friend and her best friend's boyfriend, and they're more than a little bit forward about it. They kinda casually refer to the two of us as a couple.
The next time I'm seeing 18 is on Saturday, at a party. I'm seeing 23 on Friday.
I need to hit on 23 ASAP. If I can get a decent reply out of her, I can break it off with 18 without hurting her feelings.
Don't get me wrong, I like 18. Exactly in the same sense that I like Sawhney89. She's a great girl, and a good friend. Am I into her? Not really. I hang out with her, have a decent time, and completely forget about her for a month or so.
I like her, and like hanging out with her. I don't exactly want to go out with her, but I don't want to hurt her feelings.
I've been hanging out with her for years, and I've never really been interested. She's had plenty of boyfriends during that time, all of them artfully concealed from me. She danced with a few of my buddies at various middle school dances, but she never seemed to have a boyfriend during high school. I find out that she does have one only through one of our mutual friends, six weeks into their relationship. Then, at the same party, we were discussing who has gone through the most relationships, and her friends unanimously picked her.
I'm a bit concerned, because the only reason I said yes when 18 asked me out was because she liked me, not because I liked her. Even taking 23 out of the picture, I would never have asked 18 out. I should have told her that I just wanted to be friends with her, not go out with her, when she asked. I was a jerk. I knew that I wasn't all that interested, and I said 'yes'. I don't know how long you can date someone who you don't have any romantic intrest whatsoever in, but I don't imagine that it's a very long time.
tonksy
New Member
Welll...I will say that one of the important factors in any long term relationship is the ability to be able to hang out and enjoy each others time in a completely non sexual way.
Sex is great and a wonderful way to pass the time but when it's over it's nice to be able to agree on what to watch or where to go out to eat or whether or not you want to watch the football game on Monday night or just to be able to make small talk about books and music and such.
If you've been hanging with this chick for years it's a good bet that you are somewhat on the same wavelength and that says a lot.
Sex is great and a wonderful way to pass the time but when it's over it's nice to be able to agree on what to watch or where to go out to eat or whether or not you want to watch the football game on Monday night or just to be able to make small talk about books and music and such.
If you've been hanging with this chick for years it's a good bet that you are somewhat on the same wavelength and that says a lot.
Altron
Well-Known Member
I'm feeling rather unhappy right now.
First of all, two girlfriends = no way.
If I think I have anything better than a snowball's chance in hell of getting 23, that's what I'll do.
I think 18 can handle it. There's a reason why I NEVER asked her out in the past 6 years, even when she was definetly single and I was definetly not interested in anybody. There's a reason that two thirds of the time we hang out, it was her idea. There's a reason why I've been to her house probably 50 times, and she's been to mine... twice.
I completely wimped out when she asked. I should have been honest and told her how I felt, instead of telling her what I thought she wanted to hear.
First of all, two girlfriends = no way.
If I think I have anything better than a snowball's chance in hell of getting 23, that's what I'll do.
I think 18 can handle it. There's a reason why I NEVER asked her out in the past 6 years, even when she was definetly single and I was definetly not interested in anybody. There's a reason that two thirds of the time we hang out, it was her idea. There's a reason why I've been to her house probably 50 times, and she's been to mine... twice.
I completely wimped out when she asked. I should have been honest and told her how I felt, instead of telling her what I thought she wanted to hear.
